单口喜剧天花板！看罗素·彼得斯如何用一个段子把“白人”概念彻
字幕摘录
| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 0:00 | Abu Dhabi! | 阿布扎比! 阿布扎比! 阿布扎比! |
| 0:05 | See you fuck, habibis! | 看到你他妈的,哈比人! |
| 0:09 | Give it up for my DJ starting from scratch, the one and only! | 放弃我的DJ 从零开始,唯一的! |
| 0:16 | Give it up for that guy for never giving up a buffet! | 给那个家伙放弃吧 永远不要放弃自助餐! |
| 0:19 | Give it up! | 放弃吧! |
| 0:27 | I mean that respectfully, I mean. | 我是说礼貌的 |
| 0:31 | I mean they're called skinny jeans is all I'm saying. | 我的意思是,他们被称为 瘦牛仔裤是我所说的。 |
| 0:39 | Good to have white people in the middle, that's nice to see. | 幸有白客于中,此可观也. |
| 0:46 | This is how you know the Arabs didn't want to sit right there. | 这就是你们知道阿拉伯人不想坐在那里的原因 |
| 0:48 | They're like, no please, take this seat, best seat, best seat. | 他们喜欢,不请,坐这个座位,最好的座位,最好的座位。 |
展开字幕全文（164 条）
| 序号 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Abu Dhabi! | 阿布扎比! 阿布扎比! 阿布扎比! |
| 2 | See you fuck, habibis! | 看到你他妈的,哈比人! |
| 3 | Give it up for my DJ starting from scratch, the one and only! | 放弃我的DJ 从零开始,唯一的! |
| 4 | Give it up for that guy for never giving up a buffet! | 给那个家伙放弃吧 永远不要放弃自助餐! |
| 5 | Give it up! | 放弃吧! |
| 6 | I mean that respectfully, I mean. | 我是说礼貌的 |
| 7 | I mean they're called skinny jeans is all I'm saying. | 我的意思是,他们被称为 瘦牛仔裤是我所说的。 |
| 8 | Good to have white people in the middle, that's nice to see. | 幸有白客于中,此可观也. |
| 9 | This is how you know the Arabs didn't want to sit right there. | 这就是你们知道阿拉伯人不想坐在那里的原因 |
| 10 | They're like, no please, take this seat, best seat, best seat. | 他们喜欢,不请,坐这个座位,最好的座位,最好的座位。 |
| 11 | No, I love you, I want you to have, I want. | 不,我爱你,我想你拥有,我想要 |
| 12 | Please, enjoy, please, please. | 请享受,请,请。 |
| 13 | Where are you guys from? | 你们从哪里来的? |
| 14 | UK. | 英国。 |
| 15 | UK? | 英国? |
| 16 | I'm fine, thank you, but where are you from? | 我很好,谢谢,但你来自哪里? |
| 17 | Where are you from? | 你从哪里来? |
| 18 | We'd like to answer. | 我们想回答 |
| 19 | I'm from Russia. | 我来自俄罗斯。 |
| 20 | You're from Russia? | 你来自俄罗斯? |
| 21 | That's okay, I'm not Ukrainian, it's fine. | 没关系,我不是乌克兰人,没事 |
| 22 | You can be Russian, I don't give a shit. | 你可以是俄罗斯人 我才不管呢 |
| 23 | And you're from the UK? | 你来自英国? |
| 24 | London. | 伦敦 |
| 25 | Good, London, and you? | 很好,伦敦,你呢? |
| 26 | Dubai. | 迪拜。 |
| 27 | Dubai, no, that's what I thought when I looked at you. | 迪拜,不,这就是我想的 当我看着你。 |
| 28 | You look like a bootleg Dubai. | 你看起来像一个骗子迪拜。 |
| 29 | Maybe like the Karama version of Dubai, I don't know. | 也许像卡拉玛版的迪拜,我不知道。 |
| 30 | And what's your name, Russian guy? | 你叫什么名字,俄罗斯人? |
| 31 | Your name? | 你的名字吗? |
| 32 | Tim? | 蒂姆吗? |
| 33 | Timur. | 铁木尔. |
| 34 | I'm actually also from Dubai, but... | 其实我也来自迪拜,但是... |
| 35 | I know, I know you all think you're from Dubai, but... | 我知道,我知道你们都认为你们是迪拜人,但是... |
| 36 | If you don't have an Emirati passport, you're just visiting like the rest of us. | 如果你没有埃米尔的护照, 你只是像我们其他人一样来参观。 |
| 37 | What are you doing out here, Tim? | 你在这里做什么,蒂姆? |
| 38 | What made you invade? | 是什么让你入侵的? |
| 39 | I mean, come here. | 我的意思是,来到这里。 |
| 40 | Having a good time. | 玩得开心点 |
| 41 | You're having a good time. | 你玩得很开心 |
| 42 | You living out here? | 你住在这里? |
| 43 | You live out here? | 你住在这里? |
| 44 | Yeah. | 对 |
| 45 | Is your hearing bad? | 你的听力不好吗? |
| 46 | Were you on the war front and the fucking explosions got to you? | 你是在战争前线 和他妈的爆炸得到你? |
| 47 | Who? | 谁? |
| 48 | Brett, I don't know what is happening. | Brett 我不知道发生了什么 |
| 49 | Do you know that brown kid beside you? | 你知道你身边那个棕色的孩子吗? |
| 50 | That one there, do you know him? | 那个你认识他吗? |
| 51 | He's checking, I mean... | 他在检查,我的意思是... |
| 52 | I mean, it's Dubai, everybody owns an Indian somehow. | 我的意思是,这是迪拜, 每个人都拥有一个印第安人。 |
| 53 | I don't know, we all... | 我不知道 我们都... |
| 54 | I don't know if there was a Groupon or something, but... | 我不知道有没有Groupon什么的,但是... |
| 55 | Well, it's nice to see white people, at least, you know? | 嗯,这是很好的 看到白人,至少,你知道吗? |
| 56 | And then people in white. | 然后人着白衣. |
| 57 | I don't like the term, I want to let you guys know. | 我不喜欢这个术语 我想让你们知道 |
| 58 | What's your name, English guy? | 你叫什么名字,英国人? |
| 59 | Martin. | 马丁 |
| 60 | Martin, right. | 马丁,没错。 |
| 61 | To be honest with you, Martin, you sound like a bit of a cunt. | 老实说,马丁,你听起来像个婊子 |
| 62 | I say it with respect, mate, alright? | 我尊重你,好吗? |
| 63 | And who's the ginger bastard with you? | 和你在一起的姜子混蛋是谁? |
| 64 | Hey, the big guy's like, thank God the heat's off me. | 嘿,大家伙的一样, 感谢上帝的热我。 |
| 65 | It's better to get it first than the rest of them take it after, you know what I mean? | 最好先拿到它 而不是其他人拿它之后,你知道我的意思吗? |
| 66 | My boss. | 我老板,你来干什么? |
| 67 | That's your boss? | 那是你老板吗? |
| 68 | Nice. | 不错 |
| 69 | Are you the boss? | 你是老板吗? |
| 70 | He's like, I don't intend anything either. | 他喜欢,我不打算任何东西。 |
| 71 | Are you Arab, sir? | 你是阿拉伯人吗,先生? |
| 72 | No, what are you? | 不,你是谁? |
| 73 | You're from Pakistan, so you're Indian. | 你来自巴基斯坦,所以你是印度人。 |
| 74 | Listen, if you did some DNA tracing... | 听着,如果你做了一些DNA追踪... |
| 75 | Surprise! | 惊喜! 惊喜吗? |
| 76 | I don't like the term white people, Martin, that's what I was trying to say. | 我不喜欢白人这个词 马丁 这就是我想说的 |
| 77 | I'll tell you why I don't like the term white people, because you hear white people, you automatically assume color. | 我来告诉你为什么我不喜欢白人这个词,因为你听到白人的声音,你自动假定颜色. |
| 78 | And that's just not the case with white. | 白人就不是这样 |
| 79 | Anybody could be physically white, really. | 任何人都可能是身体上的白色,真的。 |
| 80 | Anybody. | 谁都行 |
| 81 | Like, you can go to India and go to the North, and you'll meet a guy with white skin and blue eyes. | 喜欢,你可以去印度 去北方, 你会遇到一个男人 白皮肤和蓝眼睛。 |
| 82 | He'll be like, you white? | 他会像,你白人? |
| 83 | He'll be like, not even a tiny bit. | 他会像,甚至不会一点点。 |
| 84 | Like, white's more than the color, you know? | 像,白色的比颜色,你知道吗? |
| 85 | Like, look at some of the Asians. | 喜欢,看看一些亚洲人。 |
| 86 | Some of the Chinese, the Koreans, the Japanese, they're very... | 一些中国人,朝鲜人,日本人,他们非常... |
| 87 | They're physically whiter than white people. | 他们的身体比白人更白。 |
| 88 | But somehow white people got the title of white. | 但不知何故白人获得了白人的称号. |
| 89 | Obviously, you know when you look at the other Asians that they're not white. | 很明显,当你看着其他亚洲人时, 你知道他们不是白人。 |
| 90 | You know, for obvious reasons. | 你知道,有明显的原因。 |
| 91 | Because they're good at math, you know? | 因为他们擅长数学,你知道吗? |
| 92 | But even though white people got the title of white... | 但即使白人获得了白人的称号... |
| 93 | Like, there's a lot of people that are like, look at the girl behind you. | 像,有很多人 喜欢,看看你后面的女孩。 |
| 94 | She's very light skinned, right? | 她皮肤很浅,对吧? |
| 95 | You're a light skinned lady, but I could tell that you're not white. | 你是个浅色皮肤的女士 但我看得出来你不是白人 |
| 96 | But white people wouldn't know. | 但白人不会知道 |
| 97 | You know what I mean? | 你知道我的意思吗? |
| 98 | Are you Pakistani? | 你是巴基斯坦人吗? |
| 99 | I could tell right away. | 我马上就知道 |
| 100 | You guys gave each other some sort of weird look, like... | 你们给对方 某种奇怪的外观,像... |
| 101 | But physically, you're very fair skinned, you know what I mean? | 但身体上,你皮肤很美,你知道我的意思吗? |
| 102 | Like, would you have known, Martin, that that lady wasn't white? | 你知道那个女士不是白人吗? |
| 103 | I mean, obviously because we're here. | 我的意思是,很明显,因为我们在这里。 |
| 104 | But if we were somewhere else, you might have thought... | 但如果我们在别的地方,你可能认为... |
| 105 | You know, this is what happens to, like, non-white people that are very light skinned. | 你知道,这是 发生在,喜欢,非白人 皮肤很浅。 |
| 106 | We have this identity crisis, so... | 我们有这个身份危机,所以... |
| 107 | We'll try to pass ourselves, not me, but them. | 我们会试着通过自己,不是我,而是他们。 |
| 108 | They will... | 他们会... |
| 109 | I don't fucking pass off as anything. | 我他妈的不会像任何事一样放弃 |
| 110 | Other than, you know, what you see. | 除了,你知道,你看到的。 |
| 111 | But you'll meet, like, people that are very light skinned. | 但你们会遇到那些皮肤很浅的人 |
| 112 | And they'll pass themselves off as white. | 他们会像白种人一样死去 |
| 113 | And the only people that believe them are white people. | 而唯一相信他们的人就是白人. |
| 114 | The rest of us can see right through them. | 其他人可以看穿他们 |
| 115 | I'm like, dude, I know you're not white. | 我很喜欢,伙计, 我知道你不是白人。 |
| 116 | How do you know I'm not white? | 你怎么知道我不是白人吗? |
| 117 | Don't I look white? | 我看起来不白吗? |
| 118 | I go, you're very fair skinned, but I know you're not white. | 我走了,你皮肤很好,但我知道你不是白人。 |
| 119 | Well, how do you know I'm not white? | 你怎么知道我不是白人吗? |
| 120 | Don't I look white? | 我看起来不白吗? |
| 121 | I go, you look pale. | 我走了,你看起来苍白。 |
| 122 | But I know you're not... | 但我知道你不会... |
| 123 | How do you know I'm not white? | 你怎么知道我不是白人吗? |
| 124 | Because your fucking name is Gurpreet. | 因为你他妈的叫古普雷特 |
| 125 | And when you're not actually white, like you're... | 当你不是真正的白人,就像你... |
| 126 | But you're just physically white, like you're not an actual white person. | 但你只是身体上的白色, 就像你不是一个真正的白人。 |
| 127 | Your body will remind you. | 你的身体会提醒你的 |
| 128 | You know what I mean? | 你知道我的意思吗? |
| 129 | Like you, sweetheart. | 像你一样,亲爱的 |
| 130 | You're very fair skinned, right? | 你皮肤很美,对吧? |
| 131 | But I bet you your nipples are chocolatey as fuck. | 但我敢打赌,你的乳头是巧克力一样他妈的。 |
| 132 | You know what I mean? | 你知道我的意思吗? |
| 133 | Like show me one real quick. | 像给我一个真正的快速。 |
| 134 | Just one, just one. | 就一个,就一个。 |
| 135 | It's science. | 这是科学。 |
| 136 | It's for science. | 为科举. |
| 137 | I don't want to see it like sexually. | 我不想看到它像性。 |
| 138 | Okay, white lady. | 好吧,白女士,你好吗? |
| 139 | There's a white lady. | 有白妇人. |
| 140 | White lady, show her one of yours real quick. | 白妞,快给她看看你的 |
| 141 | Just show... | 只要显示... |
| 142 | I want you to see what they look like when they're raw. | 我要你们看看它们生时的样子 |
| 143 | This is... | 这是... |
| 144 | It's like uncooked. | 犹如未熟. |
| 145 | White women have nipple tartar. | 白衣女子有乳头芋头. |
| 146 | It's amazing. | 不可思议. |
| 147 | You got to see this. | 你得看看这个。 |
| 148 | It's... | 这... |
| 149 | Okay, take... | 好,拿着... |
| 150 | Take me for example, right? | 举个例子,对吧? |
| 151 | I'm a medium brown, right? | 我是一个中棕色,对不对? |
| 152 | There's darker brown than me. | 有更深的棕色 比我。 |
| 153 | There's lighter brown than me, right? | 这里的棕色比我轻,对不对? |
| 154 | But even though I'm medium brown, my junk? | 但尽管我是棕色的,我的垃圾? |
| 155 | Black as fuck. | 黑色的像他妈的。 |
| 156 | I don't understand. | 我不懂,我不懂你说什么 |
| 157 | I'm showering. | 我在冲澡 |
| 158 | I'm uncomfortable. | 我有点不舒服 |
| 159 | Like, who is this? | 喜欢,这是谁? |
| 160 | Somebody just got the joke. | 有人刚刚得到了这个笑话。 |
| 161 | Backstage, they're like, | 后台,他们喜欢, |
| 162 | there might be a delay with the translation. | 翻译工作可能会延迟。 |
| 163 | I know the delay was gonna be fucking two days later. | 我知道两天后会发生性关系 |
| 164 | I didn't know that. | 我不知道这一点。 |
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