TED演讲：抑郁了还怎么洗衣服
字幕摘录
| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 0:04 | Shortly after I published my book, I got an email. | 我出版书后不久就收到一封邮件 |
| 0:07 | It said, | 它说, |
| 0:08 | your book was the only thing that saved me from suicide. | 你的书是唯一能让我免于自杀的 |
| 0:12 | You saved my life. | 你救了我的命 你救了我的命 你救了我的命 |
| 0:14 | Now, for a book about how to clean, that's sort of odd, yeah? | 现在,关于如何清理的书, 这有点奇怪,是吗? |
| 0:19 | But what if a new approach to cleaning | 但是,如果一个新的方法 清洁 |
| 0:21 | could teach us a better approach to treating mental health? | 能教我们更好的治疗精神疾病的方法吗? |
| 0:25 | I'm not an interior designer or a lifestyle influencer. | 我不是室内设计师 也不是影响生活方式的人 |
| 0:29 | I'm just a therapist with ADHD. | 我只是个ADHD的治疗师 |
| 0:31 | And in February of 2020, I had my second baby. | 2020年2月,我生了第二个孩子 |
展开字幕全文（233 条）
| 序号 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Shortly after I published my book, I got an email. | 我出版书后不久就收到一封邮件 |
| 2 | It said, | 它说, |
| 3 | your book was the only thing that saved me from suicide. | 你的书是唯一能让我免于自杀的 |
| 4 | You saved my life. | 你救了我的命 你救了我的命 你救了我的命 |
| 5 | Now, for a book about how to clean, that's sort of odd, yeah? | 现在,关于如何清理的书, 这有点奇怪,是吗? |
| 6 | But what if a new approach to cleaning | 但是,如果一个新的方法 清洁 |
| 7 | could teach us a better approach to treating mental health? | 能教我们更好的治疗精神疾病的方法吗? |
| 8 | I'm not an interior designer or a lifestyle influencer. | 我不是室内设计师 也不是影响生活方式的人 |
| 9 | I'm just a therapist with ADHD. | 我只是个ADHD的治疗师 |
| 10 | And in February of 2020, I had my second baby. | 2020年2月,我生了第二个孩子 |
| 11 | Because with the first one, I had some postpartum anxiety, | 因为第一个, 我有一些产后焦虑, |
| 12 | and my husband had just taken a very demanding job | 我丈夫刚刚做了一份非常苛刻的工作 |
| 13 | that was going to keep him busy, | 那会让他很忙的 |
| 14 | I developed a meticulous postpartum plan for myself. | 我为自己精心制定了产后计划 |
| 15 | My family would rotate in in shifts for the first 60 days. | 我的家人在头60天里会轮班 |
| 16 | The cleaning crew would come once a month, | 清洁工每月来一次 |
| 17 | the new moms group would drop off dinners, | 新妈妈组会送饭 |
| 18 | and my toddler would go to preschool. | 我的小孩会上学前班 |
| 19 | I was so proud of this plan, | 我为这个计划感到骄傲 |
| 20 | and it ended before it even began, | 却还没开始就结束了 |
| 21 | because 2020 is when the COVID lockdowns happened, | 因为2020年是COVID封锁发生的时候, |
| 22 | and all of that support disappeared overnight. | 所有的支持 一夜之间消失了。 |
| 23 | In a blur, my days turned into breastfeeding difficulties, | 在一个模糊的,我的日子变成 哺乳困难, |
| 24 | toddler meltdowns and depression. | 幼儿期的崩溃和抑郁症。 |
| 25 | The dishes stayed in the sink for days, | 盘子在水槽里呆了好几天 |
| 26 | the laundry pile reached impressive heights, | 衣服堆积到了令人印象深刻的高度, |
| 27 | and there was often not a path to walk from room to room. | 而且往往没有一条从房间走到房间的道路。 |
| 28 | And when I should have been catching up on sleep, | 当我在睡觉时 |
| 29 | I would lay in bed at night and think to myself, | 我晚上躺在床上,想着自己 |
| 30 | I'm failing. | 我失败了 |
| 31 | Maybe I'm not capable of being a good mom to two kids. | 也许我无法成为两个孩子的好妈妈 |
| 32 | I decided to post a joke video on TikTok one day | 我决定有一天在TikTok上发布一个笑话视频 |
| 33 | about my house-turned-disaster. | 关于我的房子倒塌的灾难。 |
| 34 | Some funny shots of my clutter and my dishes | 一些滑稽的镜头,我的毛线和盘子 |
| 35 | and my enchilada pan to a nice beat. | 和我的Enchilada锅 一个很好的节拍。 |
| 36 | Sort of a laugh-to-keep-from-cry situation, surely. | 那种笑对保持 从哭的情况,当然。 |
| 37 | And I got a comment. | 我得到了一个评论。 |
| 38 | 懒zy. | |
| 39 | Yeah, that stung. | 是啊,那个刺。 |
| 40 | But I must be a glutton for punishment | 但我一定是个要惩罚的混蛋 |
| 41 | because I kept posting videos about my messy house. | 因为我一直张贴 关于我的烂房子的视频。 |
| 42 | Video after video of all of the weird tips and tricks that I was using | 我用的所有诡异的技巧和技巧 |
| 43 | to try and get it back in order | 试着把它找回来 |
| 44 | while managing my feelings of being overwhelmed. | 处理我被压抑的感觉 |
| 45 | And I braced myself for more criticism. | 我为更多的批评而坚守 |
| 46 | But what happened was entirely different. | 但所发生的事情完全不同。 |
| 47 | In the comment sections of my videos, | 在我的视频的评论部分, |
| 48 | hundreds of stories came rolling in. | 成百上千的故事卷进来了 |
| 49 | Stories like Amanda, | 像阿曼达这样的故事 |
| 50 | who after losing her baby in the second trimester, | 在三个月后失去孩子后 |
| 51 | was standing frozen at her sink | 站在她的水槽里冻僵了 |
| 52 | because she forgot how to wash dishes. | 因为她忘了怎么洗碗 |
| 53 | Stories like Lula, | 卢拉这样的故事 |
| 54 | whose chronic health problems and depression | 长期健康问题和抑郁症 |
| 55 | made it difficult for her to brush her teeth. | 让她很难刷牙 |
| 56 | Story after story of people with depression, ADHD, autism, burnout, bereavement, | 关于抑郁症、ADHD、自闭症、烧焦症、丧偶症 |
| 57 | all struggling with these daily tasks. | 这些日常任务都很难完成 |
| 58 | And it might seem odd to some of you | 你们有些人可能觉得奇怪 |
| 59 | that someone could struggle with tasks that are so simple. | 有人会为了简单的任务而挣扎 |
| 60 | But are they simple? | 但是它们很简单吗? |
| 61 | Let's think about what really goes into something like laundry. | 让我们想想 真正进入的东西 像洗衣。 |
| 62 | Everyone picture your laundry pile right now, OK? | 每个人都想象你的洗衣堆,现在,好吗? |
| 63 | How many clean clothes do you have left right now? | 你现在还剩下多少件干净的衣服? |
| 64 | Can you wash tomorrow or must it be today? | 明天洗还是今天洗? |
| 65 | Do you need to prioritize, pre-sort, pre-treat anything? | 你需要优先排序, 预处理,预处理什么? |
| 66 | Did you grow up with anybody that taught you how to do that? | 你和谁一起长大 教你怎么做? |
| 67 | You're out of laundry detergent. | 洗涤剂没了 |
| 68 | If you work three jobs, when are you going to get to the store next? | 如果你做三个工作, 你什么时候去店里? |
| 69 | So if you get there, can you afford it? | 所以,如果你到了那里,你能负担得起吗? |
| 70 | And if you can afford it, which one you choose? | 如果你能买得起,你选哪个? |
| 71 | And you get it all home, get it in there, now pick a setting. | 你得到它所有的家,得到它在那里, 现在选择一个环境。 |
| 72 | Which one? | 哪一个? |
| 73 | I don't know. | 师曰. |
| 74 | Google it. | 谷歌读取. |
| 75 | By the way, you have memory problems. | 对了,你有记忆问题 |
| 76 | So you'll remember that wash in about three days | 所以你会记得三天后洗的 |
| 77 | when it's mildewed into the washer. | 当它被温和化成洗衣机。 |
| 78 | It's OK. | 没事的 |
| 79 | Just re-wash it, OK, and get it into the dryer. | 再洗一下,把它放进烘干机里 |
| 80 | You'll forget that, too, and it'll wrinkle. | 你也会忘记的,它会皱纹。 |
| 81 | Now dry it again. | 现在又擦干它。 |
| 82 | Now all you have to do is get it out and fold it. | 现在,你要做的就是把它弄出来并折叠起来。 |
| 83 | But also you have three small children. | 还有三个小孩 |
| 84 | And those three small children haven't given you a moment alone | 那三个小孩没有给你独处的时间 |
| 85 | in quite some time, | 过了一段时间 |
| 86 | but when you finally get that moment, you have to decide, | 但当你终于得到那一刻, 你必须决定, |
| 87 | are you going to finish the laundry, are you going to eat a sandwich, | 你要洗完衣服,吃三明治吗? |
| 88 | are you going to take a nap? | 你要睡个觉吗? |
| 89 | Time's up. | 时间到了。 |
| 90 | You didn't do any of it. | 你什么都没做 |
| 91 | You stared at the wall. | 你盯着墙看 |
| 92 | You have decision fatigue, | 你有决定疲劳症 |
| 93 | because the burden of carrying a home all by yourself has burnt you out. | 因为一个人背着一个房子 把你烧焦了 |
| 94 | You see, for some of you, all of the steps and the skills | 你看,对于你们中的一些人来说,所有的步骤和技能 |
| 95 | that go into care tasks run on autopilot. | 进入护理任务 运行在自动驾驶。 |
| 96 | But for millions of people, the autopilot is broken. | 但对于数百万人来说,自动驾驶器已经坏了. |
| 97 | And what's worse, what if you had to do all of that when your mom just died? | 更糟糕的是,如果你不得不做这一切 当你妈妈刚刚去世? |
| 98 | Or your job just fired you? | 还是你的工作刚刚开除了你? |
| 99 | Or you're using every ounce of strength that you have | 或者你用你拥有的每一盎司的力量 |
| 100 | to just not kill yourself today? | 今天不自杀吗? |
| 101 | If you have access to therapy, | 如果你能得到治疗, |
| 102 | it's unlikely your therapist will ever ask you about your laundry. | 你的治疗师不可能问起你的衣服 |
| 103 | I've worked in mental health for about a decade. | 我在心理健康领域工作了十几年 |
| 104 | I've been in therapy even longer. | 我接受治疗的时间更长了 |
| 105 | And the only time I ever had a provider talk to me about things | 我唯一一次有供货商跟我谈事情 |
| 106 | like cooking and cleaning and brushing my teeth | 像烹饪、清洁、刷牙 |
| 107 | was when I was in a psych hospital as a teenager. | 我少年时在精神病院里 |
| 108 | Yet here were hundreds of thousands of people in my comment sections | 但这里有几十万人 在我的评论部分 |
| 109 | telling me that these daily care tasks were a major pain point in their life. | 告诉我这些日常护理任务 是他们生活中的一大痛苦点 |
| 110 | And so I started to wonder, | 所以我开始怀疑, |
| 111 | what if we started here? | 如果我们从这里开始呢? |
| 112 | What if we started with these care tasks? | 如果我们开始这些护理任务呢? |
| 113 | Could making daily tasks easier improve mental health quicker? | 能否使日常任务更容易改善心理健康? |
| 114 | In the two years that I've been posting and writing | 在我张贴和写作的两年里 |
| 115 | about the intersection of mental health and care tasks, | 关于精神健康和护理任务的交叉点, |
| 116 | I've come up with a philosophy that does just this. | 我已经想出了一个哲学 这样做。 |
| 117 | And it all starts with one simple idea. | 这一切都从一个简单的想法开始。 |
| 118 | Cooking, cleaning, laundry, | 烹饪 清洁 洗衣 |
| 119 | it doesn't make you a good person or a bad person. | 它不会让你成为一个好人或坏人。 |
| 120 | Listen to me. | 听我说 |
| 121 | Care tasks are morally neutral. | 护理任务在道德上是中立的。 |
| 122 | Now, I know that if you've been watching Martha Stewart for decades | 现在,我知道,如果你一直 看着玛莎·斯图尔特几十年 |
| 123 | and scrolling the perfect Pinterest aesthetic every day, | 每天滚动完美的美学, |
| 124 | that it can feel like struggling with these tasks is a moral failure, | 感觉在努力完成这些任务 是道德上的失败, |
| 125 | like it's because we're lazy or we're irresponsible or we're immature. | 就像是因为我们懒惰,或者我们不负责任,或者我们不成熟. |
| 126 | But having an organized closet doesn't make you a success. | 但有一个有条理的衣柜并不能让你成功 |
| 127 | And living out of a pile of laundry on the floor doesn't make you a failure. | 住在地板上的一堆洗衣房里并不代表你失败 |
| 128 | You know where the shirt you want to wear is, | 你知道你想穿的衬衫在哪吗? |
| 129 | it just might take you a bit of sifting to find it. | 可能要花点时间才能找到它 |
| 130 | The truth is, it's not about morality. | 事实是,这不是道德问题。 |
| 131 | It's about functionality. | 这是关于功能。 |
| 132 | Does your home work for you, | 你的家为你工作吗? |
| 133 | not some hypothetical house guest that is coming to inspect your closet? | 不是来检查衣柜的假想客吗? |
| 134 | I mentioned Amanda, who had lost her baby and forgot how to wash dishes. | 我提到阿曼达 她失去了孩子 忘了洗碗 |
| 135 | She told me that when her husband would go to work, | 她告诉我当她丈夫去上班时 |
| 136 | she would lay on the floor next to the empty crib and say to herself, | 她躺在空的婴儿床旁边 对自己说 |
| 137 | what can I bring to my family if I can't even wash dishes? | 如果我连洗碗都洗不干净 我能带什么给家人? |
| 138 | But that changed when she began to see care tasks as morally neutral. | 但当她开始认为护理任务在道德上中立时,情况就变了。 |
| 139 | All of a sudden, the dishes in the sink weren't representations | 突然间,水槽里的盘子不是代表 |
| 140 | of her failure as a wife. | 作为妻子的失败 |
| 141 | But instead, she would look at the pile | 但相反,她会看着那堆东西 |
| 142 | and think to herself, what do I need to function tomorrow morning? | 想想,我明天早上需要什么工作? |
| 143 | And then pull two coffee cups out of the pile to wash. | 然后把两个咖啡杯从堆里抽出来洗. |
| 144 | She had her coffee the next morning, | 她第二天早上喝过咖啡 |
| 145 | and it was a little bit easier to get up off the floor. | 从地板上爬起来容易一点 |
| 146 | When we liberate ourselves from the idea | 当我们从思想中解放出来 |
| 147 | that we are a good person or a bad person with care tasks, | 我们是好人 或坏人 有照顾任务, |
| 148 | we can stop thinking about the right way to do things, | 我们可以停止思考 正确的方式做事情, |
| 149 | about the way that things should be done, | 关于事情的方式, |
| 150 | and instead start thinking about what we can do with our current barriers | 而不是开始思考我们能做什么 与我们的当前障碍 |
| 151 | to improve our quality of life today. | 改善我们今天的生活质量。 |
| 152 | And this is the fun part, | 这是有趣的部分, |
| 153 | because you get to customize a life that works for you. | 因为你可以定制一种适合你的生活 |
| 154 | When Lula realized that her problems with brushing her teeth | 当露拉意识到她刷牙的问题 |
| 155 | were not moral failings, | 并不是道德败坏, |
| 156 | she gained the confidence to speak to her dental hygienist. | 她得到了信心 与她的牙科保健师说话。 |
| 157 | And together, they came up with solutions that work around her barriers. | 他们一起找到了解决她的障碍的方法。 |
| 158 | She now relies on pre-pasted disposable toothbrushes | 她现在靠的是 预先刷好的一次性牙刷 |
| 159 | that she keeps in her desk, | 她留在她的办公桌, |
| 160 | floss she keeps in the living room | 在客厅里放花 |
| 161 | and a no-rinse prescription toothpaste, | 和一粒不冲洗的牙膏, |
| 162 | because by breaking down the component parts of a dental hygiene routine | 因为通过破解 牙科卫生程序的组成部分 |
| 163 | and ensuring that each step was accessible to her mental and physical needs, | 确保每一步骤都能满足她的身心需要, |
| 164 | for the first time in a year, | 一年来第一次, |
| 165 | she's done every step in that routine for two weeks straight. | 她在这个常规中的每一步都做了两周 |
| 166 | She says that now that her teeth are clean, | 她说现在她的牙齿干净了 |
| 167 | she's a little less stressed about tomorrow's problems. | 她对明天的问题没有那么紧张 |
| 168 | And this approach can work with any care tasks that you struggle with. | 这种方法可以帮助你完成任何你努力完成的护理任务。 |
| 169 | Simply ask yourself, what am I trying to achieve | 问问你自己 我到底想达到什么目的 |
| 170 | and how can I achieve it in my way? | 我怎么能以我的方式实现呢? |
| 171 | In a rare moment of folding clothes, | 在难得的折叠衣服时刻, |
| 172 | I looked down at the baby onesie that I was folding, | 我俯视着正在折叠的婴儿裤, |
| 173 | and I thought to myself, | 我对自己想, |
| 174 | why am I folding this? | 我为什么要折这个? |
| 175 | Baby onesies don't really wrinkle. | 宝宝的不皱纹。 |
| 176 | And even if they did, nobody cares if a baby's in a wrinkly onesie. | 即使他们这么做了 没人会在乎孩子是不是在发抖 |
| 177 | Furthermore, I was probably going to change her four times before lunch. | 而且,我可能 要改变她四次 在午餐前。 |
| 178 | This doesn't need to be folded. | 这不需要折叠。 |
| 179 | I said it out loud and literally braced myself | 我大声地说, 字面上站稳了自己 |
| 180 | for the laundry police? | 为洗衣警察? |
| 181 | I don't know. | 师曰. |
| 182 | There are rules to laundry. | 洗衣服有规矩 |
| 183 | But for the first time, | 但是,这是第一次, |
| 184 | I stopped thinking about the way that laundry should be done, | 我不再想该怎么洗衣服 |
| 185 | and instead started thinking about how I could make laundry functional for me. | 转而开始思考 我如何使洗衣机功能。 |
| 186 | And I looked down at the fleece pajamas and the underwear | 我低头看那套睡衣和内衣 |
| 187 | and the athletic shorts and the tank tops | 运动短裤和坦克顶 |
| 188 | and realized almost none of my clothes actually needed to be folded. | 发现我的衣服几乎都不用折叠 |
| 189 | And I haven't folded any of it since. | 之后我再也没有折叠过 |
| 190 | I moved all of my family's clothes | 我把家里的衣服都搬走了 |
| 191 | into one closet off the laundry room, | 进入一个衣柜 从洗衣房, |
| 192 | and now I just toss things into organized bins unfolded. | 现在我把东西扔到有条理的垃圾箱里 |
| 193 | My new motto is, good enough is perfect, | 我的新座右铭是 足够完美 |
| 194 | and everything worth doing is worth doing half-assed. | 而一切值得做的事 都值得做半个屁股。 |
| 195 | You have to give yourself permission to do a little, | 你得允许自己做点什么 |
| 196 | to do it with shortcuts, | 用捷径做它, |
| 197 | to do it while breaking all of the rules, | 在打破所有规则的同时 |
| 198 | and replace that inner voice that says, | 并替换那个内心的声音 说, |
| 199 | I'm failing, | 我失败了 |
| 200 | with one that says, I'm having a hard time right now. | 一个说, 我现在有一个困难的时间。 |
| 201 | And people who are having a hard time deserve compassion. | 生活艰难的人应该得到同情。 |
| 202 | If it's too hard to shower today, | 如果今天洗澡太难 |
| 203 | grab the baby wipes. | 抓住婴儿的擦拭。 |
| 204 | It may not be the normal way to do it, | 这也许不是正常的方式 |
| 205 | but you deserve to be clean. | 但你应该干净一点 |
| 206 | If it's too hard to cook dinner, | 如果做饭太难 |
| 207 | get paper plates. | 去拿纸牌 |
| 208 | Heat up something frozen. | 热起来的东西冻结。 |
| 209 | You'll go back to cooking and washing another day, | 你会回去做饭 洗一天, |
| 210 | but the day is not today. | 但今天不是这个日子 |
| 211 | And in the meantime, you deserve to eat. | 同时,你应该吃东西 |
| 212 | If you're too depressed to do your dishes, | 如果你太沮丧 做你的菜, |
| 213 | get a two-gallon Ziploc bag and keep it in your bedroom, | 拿个两加仑的西普洛克包 放在卧室里 |
| 214 | because if you put a dirty plate into a two-gallon Ziploc bag and seal it, | 因为如果你把一个肮脏的盘子 在一个两加仑的Ziploc包并封起来, |
| 215 | it will keep the bugs away, | 它可以让虫子远离, |
| 216 | and it'll be there for you when you're ready to go back to the kitchen. | 等你准备好回厨房的时候 它会给你的 |
| 217 | Because you deserve a sanitary environment, | 因为你应该有一个卫生的环境, |
| 218 | even if you can't get out of bed. | 即使你无法下床。 |
| 219 | I could share with you hundreds of other genius solutions | 我可以和你们分享数百种其他的天才解决方案 |
| 220 | that people have come up with | 人们想出了 |
| 221 | once they embrace the idea that care tasks are morally neutral. | 一旦他们接受护理任务在道德上中立的观点。 |
| 222 | In my experience, people will exhibit mind-blowing creativity | 依我的经验,人们会展现出令人振奋的创造力 |
| 223 | when they are only taught how to speak compassionately to themselves. | 他们只被教诲说:你们自受其益。 |
| 224 | So what if mental health treatment started here? | 如果心理健康治疗从这里开始怎么办? |
| 225 | By shifting the idea of care tasks | 通过改变照顾任务的想法 |
| 226 | as these external measurements of your worthiness | 作为这些外部测量你的功用 |
| 227 | to just being morally neutral tasks | 仅仅是在道德上中立的任务 |
| 228 | that you can customize to care for yourself. | 你可以定制 照顾自己。 |
| 229 | Because if it's true | 因为如果是真的 |
| 230 | that regardless of what you struggle with, | 无论你与什么斗争, |
| 231 | you are worthy of a functional space, | 你值得一个功能空间, |
| 232 | what else might you be worthy of? | 你还值什么? |
| 233 | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
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