TED演讲：要如何在困难的时刻找到你的「为什么」？
字幕摘录
| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 0:13 | Simon, I'll start us off by saying, I mean, here we are, look, | 西蒙,我先说,我们到了 |
| 0:17 | after a year of the pandemic, | 在流行一年之后, |
| 0:20 | probably one of the most extraordinary experiences any of us have had. | 也许是我们当中最非凡的经历之一 |
| 0:25 | What do you think the unexpected psychological carryovers might be? | 你觉得意外的心理转移会是什么? |
| 0:30 | I mean, do you think we've kind of ... | 我是说 你觉得我们... |
| 0:32 | part of me thinks that people have got more fragile, | 我部分人认为人们变得更加脆弱 |
| 0:34 | that it's almost like there's a sort of learned timidity. | 这几乎就像有 某种学到的胆怯。 |
| 0:39 | Have you seen any evidence of that? | 你有看到任何证据吗? |
| 0:40 | How do you characterize it? | 你怎么形容它? |
| 0:42 | I think we've definitely all become much more aware of mental health, | 我想我们都对心理健康有了更深的认识 |
展开字幕全文（331 条）
| 序号 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Simon, I'll start us off by saying, I mean, here we are, look, | 西蒙,我先说,我们到了 |
| 2 | after a year of the pandemic, | 在流行一年之后, |
| 3 | probably one of the most extraordinary experiences any of us have had. | 也许是我们当中最非凡的经历之一 |
| 4 | What do you think the unexpected psychological carryovers might be? | 你觉得意外的心理转移会是什么? |
| 5 | I mean, do you think we've kind of ... | 我是说 你觉得我们... |
| 6 | part of me thinks that people have got more fragile, | 我部分人认为人们变得更加脆弱 |
| 7 | that it's almost like there's a sort of learned timidity. | 这几乎就像有 某种学到的胆怯。 |
| 8 | Have you seen any evidence of that? | 你有看到任何证据吗? |
| 9 | How do you characterize it? | 你怎么形容它? |
| 10 | I think we've definitely all become much more aware of mental health, | 我想我们都对心理健康有了更深的认识 |
| 11 | and that it's a real thing, | 而这是真实的事情, |
| 12 | and that mental health affects strong and healthy people. | 以及精神健康影响强健健康的人。 |
| 13 | We all suffered trauma during COVID. | 我们都在COVID期间受到创伤。 |
| 14 | Some of us dealt with it earlier, some of us dealt with it later, | 我们中有些人早些时候处理过,有些人后来处理过, |
| 15 | some of us are still dealing with it, but nobody escapes it. | 我们中有些人仍在处理,但没有人能逃脱。 |
| 16 | When COVID first started, | COVID刚开始的时候 |
| 17 | many of us had to pivot our organizations, | 我们中许多人不得不支持我们的组织, |
| 18 | had to pivot our businesses very quickly. | 我们的生意必须迅速发展 |
| 19 | And so I, like many others, we went into mission mode. | 因此,我和其他人一样, 我们进入了任务模式。 |
| 20 | And I called a friend of mine who was active-duty military, | 我打电话给我一个现役军人的朋友 |
| 21 | and I asked him a very simple question. | 我问他一个很简单的问题 |
| 22 | How do I compartmentalize my emotions so that I can stay focused on the mission? | 我如何分解我的情绪 以便我继续专注于任务? |
| 23 | And he gave me a very stern warning. | 他给我一个非常严厉的警告 |
| 24 | He said, you can't. | 他说,你不能。 |
| 25 | He said, we can compartmentalize our emotions for only a short period of time, | 他说,我们可以分化 我们的情绪 短短的时间, |
| 26 | but no one escapes the trauma of combat. | 但是没有人能逃脱战斗的创伤 |
| 27 | And he said, you may not even experience the trauma while you're in it. | 他说,你可能甚至没有经历 创伤 当你在其中。 |
| 28 | You may not experience it when you first come home. | 你刚回家的时候可能没有经历 |
| 29 | You may experience it months later. | 几个月后你会经历的 |
| 30 | He says, I experience it four or five months after I get home. | 他说,我回家四五个月后就体验到了 |
| 31 | So immediately, I hung up the phone | 我马上挂了电话 |
| 32 | and called all my A-type personality friends and said, | 打电话给我所有A型的个性朋友说 |
| 33 | OK, we think we're good, | 好吧,我们认为我们很好, |
| 34 | but we're going to get hit by this at some point, | 但是我们总有一天会受到打击 |
| 35 | and we made a deal that when we started to feel off our game, | 我们做了一个交易,当我们开始 感觉我们的游戏, |
| 36 | we would call each other, | 我们会互相呼唤 |
| 37 | save space. | 保存空间。 |
| 38 | And we made another deal that there would be no crying alone, | 我们又做了个交易 说不会独自哭泣 |
| 39 | that if you had to cry, you picked up the phone and you called somebody. | 如果你不得不哭, 你拿起电话,你打电话给某人。 |
| 40 | Well, about four or five months into COVID, | 嗯,大约四个或五个月 在COVID, |
| 41 | I started to feel off my game and I didn't know what was going on. | 我开始感觉我的游戏, 我不知道是怎么回事。 |
| 42 | And so I called that same friend in the military, | 于是我给军方那个朋友打电话 |
| 43 | and I asked no leading questions. | 我没有提出什么问题 |
| 44 | I simply asked him, | 我只是问他 |
| 45 | tell me what your symptoms are when you suffer the trauma | 告诉我你的症状 当你遭受创伤 |
| 46 | when you come home from combat. | 当你从战场回来的时候 |
| 47 | And he said, well, number one, he falls out of his sleep pattern. | 他说,第一,他脱离了睡眠模式。 |
| 48 | He said, he starts going to bed late for no reason | 他说他无缘无故要睡觉 |
| 49 | and doesn't want to get up in the morning. | 不想早上起来 |
| 50 | And I thought to myself, yep. | 我对自己想,是的。 |
| 51 | He says he has some unproductive days and he comes up with an excuse, | 他说,他有一些无产阶级的日子 而且他想出一个借口, |
| 52 | like, it's OK, you know, you deserve a rest, it's fine. | 没关系,你应该休息,没事的 |
| 53 | But then he has another and another and another. | 但后来他又有了另一个和另一个 |
| 54 | And I thought to myself, yep. | 我对自己想,是的。 |
| 55 | And he said he becomes very antisocial, | 他说他变得非常反社会 |
| 56 | where he doesn't want to ask for help | 在那里,他不想寻求帮助 |
| 57 | and he definitely doesn't want to talk to anybody. | 他绝对不想跟任何人说话 |
| 58 | And I thought to myself, yep. | 我对自己想,是的。 |
| 59 | And I realized what I was going through was trauma. | 我意识到我经历的是创伤。 |
| 60 | And I was afraid to use the D word, depression, | 我害怕用D词 抑郁症 |
| 61 | for fear that that was some sort of diagnosis. | 因为担心那是某种诊断 |
| 62 | And I think a lot of people are afraid of that word. | 我认为很多人都害怕这个词。 |
| 63 | But that's exactly what I was going through. | 但这正是我经历的。 |
| 64 | I was going through lowercase D, depression. | 我经历了小写D,抑郁症。 |
| 65 | And I followed the rule that we set with our friends | 我遵循了我们和朋友们共同制定的规则 |
| 66 | and I called people. | 我打电话给人们。 |
| 67 | Because one of the things I asked my friend is, how do you overcome it? | 因为我问我朋友的一件事是 你是怎么克服的? |
| 68 | He said, you have to force yourself back into a sleep pattern | 他说,你必须强迫自己回到睡眠模式 |
| 69 | and you have to force yourself to call friends and ask for help. | 你必须强迫自己给朋友打电话求救 |
| 70 | And so I think one of the things that I think that comes out of COVID, | 所以我想到了从COVID中得出的东西之一, |
| 71 | is we recognized just the importance of human connection. | 我们只是认识到人类联系的重要性。 |
| 72 | You know, in this fast-paced digital world, | 你知道,在这个快节奏的数字世界, |
| 73 | we kidded ourselves to think that we had connections | 我们自欺欺人 以为我们有联系 |
| 74 | just because we were connected. | 只是因为我们有联系 |
| 75 | But it was amazing to see when COVID started, | 但是当COVID开始的时候 令人惊讶的是 |
| 76 | regardless of someone's age or technological competency, | 不论年龄或技术能力如何 |
| 77 | we all picked up the phone. | 我们都接电话了 |
| 78 | Like, young people were talking to each other. | 年轻人在互相交谈 |
| 79 | And I think that intense craving for a human voice and human touch, | 我认为那强烈的渴望 一个人类的声音和人类的触摸, |
| 80 | I think we were reminded just how fragile we are as human beings. | 我想有人提醒我们,我们作为人类是多么脆弱。 |
| 81 | CA That phrase you mentioned, | 加利福尼亚 你提到的这句话 |
| 82 | no crying alone, that's powerful. | 不要独自哭泣,这是强大的。 |
| 83 | Did you cry with someone? | 你和别人哭过吗? |
| 84 | Yes. | 对 |
| 85 | I followed my own counsel to my friends, | 我听从了自己对朋友的建议 |
| 86 | and when I had to cry, when I was overwhelmed, | 当我不得不哭泣, 当我不堪重负, |
| 87 | I picked up the phone and I just cried. | 我拿起电话,我只是哭了。 |
| 88 | And I had friends call me and do the same. | 我有朋友给我打电话 做同样的事情 |
| 89 | CA And there was healing in that. | 加利福尼亚 里面还有治疗 |
| 90 | The most important thing that came from it | 最重要的东西来自它 |
| 91 | was that none of us felt alone. | 是,我们没有人感到孤独。 |
| 92 | And there's intense safety, | 安全性很强 |
| 93 | that amazing sense of safety that we all desire as human beings. | 作为人类,我们都渴望的惊人的安全感。 |
| 94 | You know, you can't feel safe when you're vulnerable. | 你知道,你无法感到安全 当你脆弱。 |
| 95 | Like, that's when we need it the most. | 就像我们最需要的时候 |
| 96 | But you have to build those relationships. | 但你必须建立这些关系。 |
| 97 | You build those relationships in the happy times and the good times | 你建立这些关系 在快乐的时代和美好的日子 |
| 98 | where you think you're strong and think you're great. | 在那里你觉得自己很坚强 觉得自己很棒 |
| 99 | You know, it's very hard to start building those relationships | 你知道,很难开始建立这些关系 |
| 100 | in the moment of crisis. | 在危机时刻。 |
| 101 | And I think that's sort of a lesson for leadership, quite frankly. | 我认为这是一个教训 领导,非常坦率。 |
| 102 | You know, which is you can't judge the quality of a crew | 你知道,这就是你不能判断一个船员的素质 |
| 103 | by how a ship performs in calm waters. | 以在平静的水域中航行的方式发誓, |
| 104 | You judge the quality of a crew by how a ship performs in rough waters. | 你用船在水中的表现来判断船员的质量 |
| 105 | But the time in calm waters is when you're building relationship | 但是在平静的水域里,时间是 当你建立关系 |
| 106 | and when you're building trust. | 当你建立信任时 |
| 107 | And you don't really actually know if you have trusting relationships | 你真的不知道你有没有信任的关系 |
| 108 | and trusting teens and loving relationships until the crisis strikes. | 信任十几岁和爱的关系 直到危机降临 |
| 109 | And I think I heard this from a lot of people. | 我想我从很多人那里听到了这个 |
| 110 | 当COVID发生时, | |
| 111 | they commented on how they realized who their real friends were. | 他们评论他们如何意识到 他们真正的朋友是谁。 |
| 112 | Some people kind of fell by the wayside, it was nothing personal. | 有些人在路边摔倒了 并不是针对个人的 |
| 113 | It's just like we didn't call each other, | 就像我们没有打过电话一样 |
| 114 | and we weren't angry or anything. | 我们没有生气 |
| 115 | And there were some people who came out of the woodwork | 有人从木头里出来 |
| 116 | {\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}那些友情兴盛 {\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}我们很幸运 | |
| 117 | And that's what I mean. | 这就是我的意思。 |
| 118 | It takes hardship for those friendships and that trust | 这些友谊和信任都很难过 |
| 119 | to really bear fruit. | 真正产生结果。 |
| 120 | But that's why we have to invest in people | 但是这就是为什么我们必须投资人 |
| 121 | when we're doing well and we don't think we need anybody. | 当我们做得很好 而且我们认为我们不需要任何人。 |
| 122 | And I think we forget that. | 我认为我们忘了这一点。 |
| 123 | CA What would you say to someone who has realized | 加利福尼亚 你会对一个意识到 |
| 124 | that they're in this moment, what's been a really difficult year, | 他们正在这一刻, 多么艰难的一年, |
| 125 | and they actually don't feel that they're someone they could, for example, | 他们其实并不觉得自己是他们可以做到的人 比如说, |
| 126 | pick up the phone and cry with? | 拿起电话一起哭? |
| 127 | Is it hopeless for them until this passes, or what would you say to them? | 难道在这之前他们没有希望吗? 还是你会对他们说什么? |
| 128 | CA There's an irony in when we need help. | 加利福尼亚 当我们需要帮助时,这有点讽刺 |
| 129 | And when I was writing the book, Leaders Eat Last, | 当我写这本书的时候,领袖们最后吃, |
| 130 | I had the opportunity to spend some time with and visit Alcoholics Anonymous. | 我有机会和匿名酗酒者相处一段时间 |
| 131 | And it is a remarkable organization. | 这是一个了不起的组织。 |
| 132 | And many of us are familiar with the 12-step program, | 我们很多人都熟悉12步计划 |
| 133 | and many of us are familiar with the first step, | 而我们中许多人对第一步是熟悉的, |
| 134 | which is admitting you have a problem. | 承认你有一个问题。 |
| 135 | But then it's the other 11 steps that also matter. | 但是,其他11个步骤也同样重要。 |
| 136 | And Alcoholics Anonymous knows | 和酒类匿名知道 |
| 137 | that if you master the first 11 steps but not the 12th, | 如果你掌握了前11步,但不是12步, |
| 138 | you are likely to succumb to the disease. | 你可能会屈服于疾病。 |
| 139 | But if you master the 12 steps, you're more likely to overcome the disease. | 但如果你掌握十二步,你更可能战胜疾病. |
| 140 | That 12th step is to help another alcoholic. | 第十二步是为了帮助另一个酒鬼 |
| 141 | It's service. | 这是服务。 |
| 142 | And so there's a great irony when we need help | 所以当我们需要帮助时 会有很大的讽刺意味 |
| 143 | to actually help someone who's struggling with the same thing as us, | 帮助一个和我们一样挣扎的人 |
| 144 | and it is the most healing thing we can do. | 这是我们能做的最好的治疗方法 |
| 145 | So if we need someone to cry with, | 所以,如果我们需要人 与哭泣, |
| 146 | it's to offer the shoulder for somebody else to cry with. | 是为了让别人一起哭 |
| 147 | If we're feeling lonely, | 如果我们感到孤独, |
| 148 | it's to be there for someone else who's struggling with loneliness. | 是为另一个孤独挣扎的人 |
| 149 | And this goes way beyond these subjects, | 这远远超出了这些科目, |
| 150 | which is if we're looking for love to help somebody else find love, | 如果我们要找爱来帮助别人找到爱 |
| 151 | if we're looking for the job we love to help somebody else find the job, | 如果我们在找我们喜欢的工作 帮助别人找到工作, |
| 152 | and there's tremendous value in service. | 服务的价值很高 |
| 153 | And you hear about these things all the time. | 你一直听说这些事 |
| 154 | You talk to people why they chose to go in the profession they went into, | 你和别人说为什么他们选择从事他们从事的职业 |
| 155 | especially if they're in the service profession. | 特别是如果他们在服务行业。 |
| 156 | Like, let's say somebody is a counselor for trauma, | 比如说 有人是心理创伤的顾问 |
| 157 | and you say, why did you go into the profession? | 你说,你为什么要从事这个职业? |
| 158 | You're like, well, when I was younger, I suffered a trauma, | 你就像,嗯, 当我年轻的时候, 我遭受了创伤, |
| 159 | and somebody was there to counsel me, | 有人在那里劝我 |
| 160 | and I decided I wanted to commit my life to doing that for others. | 我决定要为别人这么做 |
| 161 | This is what happens with service. | 服务就是这样的 |
| 162 | And we forget, just because we live in a modern world, | 我们忘记了 我们生活在现代世界 |
| 163 | we're actually a very old-fashioned machine. | 我们实际上是一个非常古老的机器。 |
| 164 | The human animal is a legacy machine living in a modern world, | 人类的动物是生活在现代世界的传承机器 |
| 165 | and we still work the same way we used to, | 我们仍然以过去的方式工作, |
| 166 | and we desperately need each other to survive | 我们迫切需要彼此生存 |
| 167 | and thrive as much as we did | 和我们一样繁荣 |
| 168 | when we were living in huts and small tribes of 150 people. | 我们住在小屋和小部落里 150人。 |
| 169 | And so, service is the thing. | 所以,服务是事情。 |
| 170 | CA It sounds like, even for someone who's not feeling, like, | 加利福尼亚 听起来就像,即使一个人 谁没有感觉,喜欢, |
| 171 | depressed or on the edge right now, | 抑郁症或现在的边缘, |
| 172 | but a good checklist question to ask is, | 但一个好的清单问题 问, |
| 173 | is there someone I could reach out to, actually? | 我可以联系到谁吗? |
| 174 | That there may be other people in a much worse situation, | 可能还有其他人处于更糟糕的境地 |
| 175 | and maybe there is a colleague that would be incredibly valuable to that person | 也许有个同事对那个人来说 很有价值 |
| 176 | and help build a relationship with the future? | 帮助与未来建立关系? |
| 177 | CA Yeah, are you OK is the best, is, you know, how are you? | CA,你还好吗? 你怎么样? |
| 178 | It's sort of, you know, a friend of mine, George Flynn, | 我的朋友乔治・弗林 |
| 179 | he says his test for a leader is, | 他说他对领袖的考验是 |
| 180 | if they ask you how you're doing, they actually care about the answer. | 如果他们问你情况如何 他们其实很在意答案 |
| 181 | And I really like that. | 我真的很喜欢 |
| 182 | CA OK, boy, I could talk with you for hours about this, | CAOK,孩子,我可以跟你谈几个小时, |
| 183 | but we're going to go to some questions now. | 但我们现在要问几个问题 |
| 184 | So here's a question from Kayum. | 卡尤姆有个问题 |
| 185 | If there is no way to get back to normal, as you said, | 如果无法恢复正常,就像你说的 |
| 186 | then are we on the right path of building new normal already? | 那么我们已经走上了建立新常态的正确道路了吗? |
| 187 | Or can you help us with a blueprint that new normal should be based on? | 或者你能帮助我们找到一个新常态应该基于的蓝图吗? |
| 188 | CA So, 蓝图, 不. | |
| 189 | Guidance is yes. | 指导是肯定的。 |
| 190 | I think that humanity has to be ... | 我认为人类必须... |
| 191 | You know, we have to remember that humanity matters. | 你知道,我们必须记住,人性很重要。 |
| 192 | And when I say humanity, I don't mean big-H humanity, | 当我说人性, 我不是说大H人性, |
| 193 | I mean little-H humanity, our humanity. | 我的意思是小H人类,我们的人类。 |
| 194 | When COVID first happened, | 当COVID第一次发生时, |
| 195 | so many leaders leaned on their humanity. | 如此众多的领导人倚仗着自己的人性. |
| 196 | Whether they were effective or ineffective leaders prior to COVID, | 无论他们在COVID之前是有效还是无效的领导人, |
| 197 | many of them picked up the phone and said, | 很多人拿起电话说 |
| 198 | are you OK? | 你没事吧? |
| 199 | They called their teams just to check in on them. | 他们打给他们的团队 只是检查他们。 |
| 200 | Or they called their friends to say, are you OK? | 或者他们打电话给朋友说,你没事吧? |
| 201 | How are you? | 你好吗? |
| 202 | Well, we don't need a global pandemic to do that. | 我们不需要全球大流行来做到这一点。 |
| 203 | That's called good leadership, and we should be doing that all the time. | 这叫做良好的领导,我们应当经常这样做。 |
| 204 | And we should be encouraging those in our charge | 我们应该鼓励那些负责的人 |
| 205 | to do the same for those in their charge. | 对他们负责的人也一样 |
| 206 | The hierarchy can still be effective that way. | 等级制度仍然可以有效。 |
| 207 | I hope that remains. | 我希望这种情况仍然存在。 |
| 208 | I hope the use of the telephone remains, | 我希望电话能用到 |
| 209 | that we don't just go back to texting all the time. | 我们不只是回到发短信所有的时间。 |
| 210 | I hope that putting our phones away and having family dinner remains. | 我希望我们把电话收起来 还有家宴 |
| 211 | I think there's a lot of kids that will actually come through this | 我想有很多孩子会通过这个 |
| 212 | with stronger relationships with their siblings if they have them, | 他们与兄弟姐妹的关系更加密切,如果他们有的话, |
| 213 | and stronger relationship with their parents | * 加强与父母的关系 |
| 214 | because they had so much time together. | 因为他们有这么多的时间在一起。 |
| 215 | And kids who may have struggled prior | 和孩子谁可能 挣扎之前 |
| 216 | because they weren't getting the kind of attention they needed | 因为他们没有得到他们需要的注意 |
| 217 | because their parents were so busy with work, | 因为父母忙于工作 |
| 218 | even if mom or dad are busy on a Zoom call all day, | 即使爸爸妈妈整天忙着打扫 |
| 219 | that hour that they would ordinarily just go get a cup of coffee | 那时候他们通常只好去喝杯咖啡 |
| 220 | or something that they could focus on their kid, | 或者他们可以关注孩子的东西, |
| 221 | I think a lot of kids actually will come out of this, | 我想很多孩子会从中出来, |
| 222 | and kids are remarkably adaptable. | 孩子们的适应能力很强 |
| 223 | They're remarkably adaptable. | 它们适应性很强 |
| 224 | Here's a question from Marius. | 马略问曰. |
| 225 | Could you give us some tips on how to discover, ah, why? | 你能给我们一些关于 如何发现,啊,为什么? |
| 226 | Absolutely, I'll give you a little exercise | 当然,我给你一点锻炼 |
| 227 | that you can do with your friends. | 你可以和你的朋友们在一起 |
| 228 | It's called the friends exercise. | 这叫朋友运动 |
| 229 | Find a friend you love and who loves you. | 找个爱你的朋友 |
| 230 | The person who, if they called you at three o'clock in the morning, | 那个早上三点打给你的人 |
| 231 | you take the call and you know they would do the same for you. | 你接电话,你知道他们会为你做同样的事情 |
| 232 | Do not do this with a sibling, do not do this with a spouse, | 你们不要以弟兄为妻,不要以配偶为妻, |
| 233 | do not do this with a parent, those relationships are too close. | 不要和父母做这些, 这些关系太近了。 |
| 234 | Do it with a best friend. | 与善友作么生会. |
| 235 | And go up to them and ask the simple question, | 然后去问他们一个简单的问题, |
| 236 | why are we friends? | 为什么我们是朋友? |
| 237 | And they're going to look at you like you're crazy, | 他们会把你当疯子看待 |
| 238 | because you're asking them to put into words a feeling. | 因为你要他们表达一种感觉 |
| 239 | You're asking them to use a part of the brain, the neocortex, | 你要求他们用大脑的一部分,新科特克斯, |
| 240 | that doesn't control feelings, | 这不能控制感情, |
| 241 | and to put the thing that exists in the limbic brain into language, | 并且把存在于边缘大脑的东西 变成语言, |
| 242 | which it doesn't do. | 它没有做。 |
| 243 | And so it's actually a very difficult question. | 所以实际上这是一个非常困难的问题。 |
| 244 | They're going to say, I don't know. | 他们会说,我不知道。 |
| 245 | It's not that they don't know, it's that they can't put it into words. | 不是他们不知道,而是他们不能把它用在文字上. |
| 246 | So ironically, you stop asking the question why, | 讽刺的是 你别再问为什么 |
| 247 | and you start asking the question what, | 你开始问问题是什么, |
| 248 | because what is a rational question, right? | 因为什么是一个合理的问题,对不对? |
| 249 | What is it about me that I know that you would be there for me no matter what? | 我怎么会知道 无论怎样你都会支持我? |
| 250 | And they won't know how to answer it. | 他们不会回答的 |
| 251 | They'll start describing you, | 他们会开始描述你, |
| 252 | I don't know, you're funny, I trust you, you've always been there for me, | 我不知道,你很好笑 我相信你,你一直陪着我 |
| 253 | you play devil's advocate. | 你扮演魔鬼的倡导者。 |
| 254 | Good, that's the definition of a friend. | 很好 这就是朋友的定义 |
| 255 | What specifically is it about me that I know you'd be there for me no matter what? | 我到底有什么具体的事 我知道你会陪着我的 |
| 256 | And they'll continue to do the same, they'll keep trying to describe you, | 他们会继续做同样的, 他们会一直试图描述你, |
| 257 | you keep playing devil's advocate. | 你继续扮演魔鬼的倡导者。 |
| 258 | That's the definition of a best friend, you get the idea. | 这就是最好的朋友的定义,你得到这个想法。 |
| 259 | Eventually, they'll give up. | 最终,他们会放弃。 |
| 260 | Eventually, they'll give up, | 最终,他们会放弃, |
| 261 | and they'll start describing themselves. | 他们会开始描述自己 |
| 262 | And they'll say, and this is what my friend said to me when I did it with them, | 他们会说,这就是我的朋友对我说的话 当我做他们, |
| 263 | they said, I don't know, Simon, I don't even have to talk to you, | 他们说,我不知道,西蒙, 我甚至不用和你说话, |
| 264 | I could just sit in the same room as you and I feel inspired. | 我可以和你坐在同一间屋子里 我感觉很受启发 |
| 265 | And I got goosebumps, in fact, I'm getting them right now. | 我得到了鹅肉,事实上, 我得到了他们现在。 |
| 266 | They will articulate the value you have in their life, | 他们会表达你生命中的价值 |
| 267 | and you will have some sort of emotional response, | 你会有某种情绪反应, |
| 268 | goosebumps, or you're well up. | 鹅巴,或者你很好。 |
| 269 | Because what they're telling you is your why. | 因为他们告诉你的就是你的原因 |
| 270 | Your why is the thing you give to the world. | 汝为甚么而给世间. |
| 271 | You can do this with multiple friends, | 你可以和多个朋友一起做 |
| 272 | and they will say almost exactly, if not the exact same thing, | 他们将说几乎完全相同的话, |
| 273 | because that is your why, that is the thing you give to the world. | 因为这就是你的原因 这就是你给世界的东西 |
| 274 | So it may not give you the exact language, | 所以它可能不会给你 准确的语言, |
| 275 | but it'll put you squarely in the ballpark for what your why is. | 但它会把你 完全在球场上为你的原因。 |
| 276 | CA.B. | (原始内容存档于2017-09-21). CA. |
| 277 | Here's an anonymous question. | 这是一个匿名问题。 |
| 278 | I have a friend who is currently struggling with depression, | 我有一个朋友,他正在挣扎 与抑郁症, |
| 279 | and it's just not like he used to be. | 和他以前不一样 |
| 280 | I don't know what to say to him. | 我不知道该对他说什么 |
| 281 | He's actually annoyed by the question, | 他其实很烦恼的问题, |
| 282 | how are you doing, how can I offer my help? | 或妓и或腊Γ |
| 283 | CA.B. | (原始内容存档于2017-09-21). CA. |
| 284 | So one of the things I learned by accident a couple years ago | 几年前我偶然学到的一件事 |
| 285 | is sometimes statements work better than questions. | 有时,发言比提问效果更好。 |
| 286 | Because questions people can avoid, right? | 因为人们可以避免疑问,对吧? |
| 287 | This is what we all did during COVID, how are you? | 这是我们在COVID期间所做的,你好吗? |
| 288 | Fine, I'm fine, everyone's fine, right? | 好吧,我没事,每个人都没事,对不对? |
| 289 | And then what do you do with that? | 那你怎么办? |
| 290 | And so try making a statement, right? | 并尝试做一个声明,对不对? |
| 291 | Something's wrong, something's different, | 有点不对劲,有些不一样 |
| 292 | you're not the same, | 你不一样, |
| 293 | I'm worried about you. | 我很担心你。 |
| 294 | Make statements. | 做笔录 |
| 295 | And it leaves very little room for somebody to divert the conversation. | 它给别人转移话题留下了很小的空间。 |
| 296 | You're not the person I know. | 你不是我认识的人 |
| 297 | And do it with love and empathy. | 并用爱和同情来完成. |
| 298 | And most important thing, don't show up to solve the problem, | 最重要的是,不要出现来解决问题, |
| 299 | especially when you're starting to have a difficult conversation. | 特别是当你开始 很难的对话。 |
| 300 | You don't show up to solve the problem, | 你不来解决问题, |
| 301 | you show up to create an environment in which they'd be willing to open up to you. | 你来创造他们愿意对你开放的环境 |
| 302 | That's the only goal. | 这是唯一的目标。 |
| 303 | So try a statement instead of a question. | 所以尝试一个陈述而不是一个问题。 |
| 304 | CA.B. | (原始内容存档于2017-09-21). CA. |
| 305 | So here's the last question I'm going to ask this for me. | 所以,这是最后一个问题 我要问我这个。 |
| 306 | What do you mean, Simon, when you say that everyone is a leader? | 你说每个人都是领袖是什么意思? |
| 307 | CA.B. | (原始内容存档于2017-09-21). CA. |
| 308 | Leadership has nothing to do with rank or title. | 领导与军衔或职称无关. |
| 309 | I know many people who sit at the highest levels of organizations | 我认识很多在组织最高层任职的人 |
| 310 | who are not leaders. | 他们不是领袖。 |
| 311 | We do as they tell us because they have authority over us, | 我们照他们说的做 因为他们对我们有权力 |
| 312 | but we don't trust them and we wouldn't follow them. | 但我们不相信他们 也不会跟随他们 |
| 313 | And yet, I also know many people who sit at very low levels of organizations | 然而,我也认识很多在组织级别非常低的人 |
| 314 | that have no formal rank and no formal authority, | 没有正式地位和正式权威, |
| 315 | and yet they've made the choice to look after the person to the left of them | 他们选择照顾左边的人 |
| 316 | and look after the person to the right of them, | 照顾他的权利, |
| 317 | and we would trust them and follow them anywhere. | 我们信任他们,随他们而去 |
| 318 | Leadership is the responsibility to see those around us rise. | 领导是我们周围的人崛起的责任。 |
| 319 | It's the responsibility to take care of those around us. | 照顾周围的人是责任 |
| 320 | That's what leadership is. | 这就是领导地位. |
| 321 | It's not about being in charge, | 这不是要负责, |
| 322 | it's about taking care of those in our charge. | 而是要照顾那些我们负责的人 |
| 323 | And the only thing title and authority allow you to do | 和唯一的事情 标题和权威让你做 |
| 324 | is lead with greater scale. | 以更大的规模领先。 |
| 325 | Every single one of us has the opportunity to be the leader we wish we had. | 我们每个人都有机会成为我们希望的领袖。 |
| 326 | Every single one of us. | 我们每一个人 |
| 327 | CA.B. | (原始内容存档于2017-09-21). CA. |
| 328 | Simon, thank you so much for spending this time with us. | 西蒙,谢谢你这次和我们在一起 |
| 329 | Thanks, Chris, I really appreciate it. | 谢谢 克里斯,我真的很感谢。 |
| 330 | Take自 care, take自 care. | |
| 331 | CA.B. Thanks, Chris. | CAB 谢谢 克里斯 |
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