推荐微信扫码登录以获得更好的体验!另:🎉建议更新到最新版,以体验新功能!🎉 版本更新记录→

TED演讲:如何发掘真实的自我

TED演讲:如何发掘真实的自我

TED演讲:如何发掘真实的自我

发布于 2024-02-23 · 时长 15:09

字幕摘录

时间英文中文
0:04I am a late bloomer.我是一个晚开花者。
0:07In fact, a friend of mine you may have heard of, Chris Rock,事实上,我的一个朋友 你可能听说过,克里斯・洛克,
0:11he once called me the most late-blooming mofo he'd ever met.他曾经称我为他见过的最晚的
0:17Now, some people might consider that snide, but I revel in it.现在,有些人可能认为 潜伏,但我欣赏它。
0:22I'm 55, and I'm hearing this curvy body as someone who has done the work,我55岁了,我听到这个弯曲的身体 作为一个人谁完成了工作,
0:28lived the life, walked the walk in these very high heels,过着生活 穿着高跟鞋走着
0:33and therefore is qualified to testify in the church and in the court of law因此有资格在教堂和法院作证
0:38that it does, in fact, get greater later.事实上,它以后会变大
0:48Now, coming to this realization wasn't easy.现在,来到这个认识是不容易的。
0:50At the age of 38, I was a very successful fashion advertising executive,在38岁时,我是一个非常成功的时尚广告主管,
展开字幕全文(297 条)
序号英文中文
1I am a late bloomer.我是一个晚开花者。
2In fact, a friend of mine you may have heard of, Chris Rock,事实上,我的一个朋友 你可能听说过,克里斯・洛克,
3he once called me the most late-blooming mofo he'd ever met.他曾经称我为他见过的最晚的
4Now, some people might consider that snide, but I revel in it.现在,有些人可能认为 潜伏,但我欣赏它。
5I'm 55, and I'm hearing this curvy body as someone who has done the work,我55岁了,我听到这个弯曲的身体 作为一个人谁完成了工作,
6lived the life, walked the walk in these very high heels,过着生活 穿着高跟鞋走着
7and therefore is qualified to testify in the church and in the court of law因此有资格在教堂和法院作证
8that it does, in fact, get greater later.事实上,它以后会变大
9Now, coming to this realization wasn't easy.现在,来到这个认识是不容易的。
10At the age of 38, I was a very successful fashion advertising executive,在38岁时,我是一个非常成功的时尚广告主管,
11and I was really living what most people considered a dream life.我真正生活在大多数人认为的梦想生活。
12I was jet-setting to fashion shows.我在为时装秀打飞机
13I was receiving free designer clothes.我收到了免费设计师的衣服。
14I was double-kissing my way across the globe.我在全球各地亲吻双吻
15It was.没错
16And, you know, it was everything that I ever wanted it to be,而且,你知道,这是我一直想要的一切,
17and then one day I realized I was only pretending to be happy.有一天我意识到 我只是假装快乐
18But I couldn't blow up my good life in my prime earning years, right?但我不能毁了我的美好生活 在我的主要收入年代,对不对?
19Wrong.错.
20Which leads me to lessons my mother, Lolly, taught me.这让我学到了我妈妈Lolly教我的教训
21Lolly的第一课?
22Don't settle.别闹了
23Now, I'm aware that my well-paying, glamorous career现在,我知道,我的高薪,光彩的事业
24is not exactly the humdrum, I-hate-my-job stereotype我恨我的工作定型
25that most people equate with settling.大多数人都认为是定居。
26But it was a settle for me.但它是一个解决我。
27Because when I actually did quit my job at the age of 38,因为当我在38岁时就辞职了
28it was with the intention that every day be a great adventure.它的用意是 每天是一个伟大的冒险。
29Now, sometimes it was a very scary adventure,现在,有时这是一个非常可怕的冒险,
30like being broke from the age of 40 to 45.就像从40岁到45岁被打破一样
31But even still, I wouldn't trade that for the safe and settled version,但即使如此 我也不会用这个来换取安全而安定的版本
32because if I had, I would not be here with y'all today.因为如果我有的话 我今天就不会和你们在一起了
33Yeah.对
34So you know how when you, like, buck the system所以,你知道如何 当你,喜欢,打击系统
35and go against the status quo?违背现状?
36It makes people really uncomfortable.这让人很不舒服。
37And invariably, people will ask, where do you get your confidence?人们总是会问 你从哪里得到信心?
38Now, some people mean it as a compliment,现在,有些人说这是赞美,
39but very often it's shady.但经常是阴暗的
40And it's a silent judgment.亦是无声之判.
41And to those people, I respond with a quote我对这些人的回答是
42from this Brooklyn poet you may have heard of,从布鲁克林诗人 你可能听说过,
43Jay-Z, she get it from her mama.Jay -Z 她从她妈妈那里得到的
44I am she, and my mama is the epitome of a grown-ass woman,我是她,我妈妈是 一个成年屁股女人的缩写,
45someone who has always been very comfortable in her skin.她的皮肤一直很舒适
46In 1965, my mom was 37 years old.1965年,母亲37岁.
47She already had one child, my big brother Jerry.她已经有一个孩子了 我的哥哥杰瑞
48And she married my dad, but she kept her maiden name.她嫁给了我爸爸 但她保留了娘家姓
49And then she had my sister Stephanie and I back to back.然后她把我妹妹史蒂芬妮和我带回来
50But she continued to work because she refused to be但她继续工作是因为她拒绝
51beholden to my dad for money.仰赖我爸爸的钱。
52And I bet my mom was the only woman in our neighborhood我敢打赌,我妈妈是我们附近唯一的女人
53who cooked once a week.每周煮一次饭
54She made Sunday dinner.她做了周日晚饭。
55It was an extravaganza, but that's all she did.是个意外,不过她就是这样
56She cooked one day a week.她每周一天做饭
57My mom is just amazing.我妈妈真是太棒了
58And she also had this ability of talking to her children她也有这种能力跟孩子说话
59about real life and making sure that we understood关于真实生活 并确保我们理解
60the virtues of going your own way,你走自己路的优点,
61which is why I believe today at the age of 94,这就是为什么我今天相信 在94岁,
62in a recent widow, my mom is still carving out ways在最近一个寡妇, 我妈妈仍然在寻找方法
63to find and determine and define her own version of happiness.寻找、确定和定义她自己的幸福版本。
64She cooks for herself.她自己煮饭
65She maintains her home exactly as she sees fit.她维持着自己认为合适的家。
66She enjoys champagne and R-rated films.她喜欢香槟和R级电影.
67My mom has managed to maintain her glamor,我妈妈一直保持她的魅力,
68her sex appeal, you know, her independence.她的性吸引力,你知道, 她的独立性。
69And I really hope some of that rubs off on me.我真的很希望我身上有一些擦伤。
70You know, recently I've been thinking about one of the best最近我一直在想一个最好的
71lessons that my mom ever taught me,我妈妈教过我的课
72which is the literal beauty in aging.那是在衰老时期的美丽。
73Now we all know that black don't crack, right?现在我们都知道黑色不会裂开 对吧?
74Okay.摆
75Black don't crack.黑不开裂.
76So at the age of 50, my mom could have easily passed所以在50岁的时候 我妈可以轻易通过
77for the age of 35.35岁。
78And you know, that's back during the time when people,你知道,这是回 在人们,
79women were really quiet about their age.女人对她们的年龄很安静
80Oh, a lady never tells her age.哦,一个女士从来没有告诉 她的年龄。
81My mom never subscribed to that.我妈从没同意过
82She was always proud of her age.她总是以年龄为荣
83As a matter of fact, she believes you may not tell your age,事实上,她相信 你可能不会告诉你的年龄,
84but your hands and your neck will.但你的手和脖子会。
85So make peace with aging or prepare for an entire wardrobe所以,与老旧和好,或准备 整个衣柜
86of gloves and turtlenecks.手套和乌龟。
87Yeah, my mom has always done these wonderful things是啊,我妈妈总是做这些美妙的事情
88like that, but I wish she could rub off on everyone喜欢这样,但我希望她能 抚摸每个人
89because I feel like now I'm looking at even 20 somethings因为我现在感觉好像在看20样东西
90who have a fear of aging.他们是怕老化的。
91I watch them on social media, like, you know,我在社交媒体上看到他们, 就像,你知道,
92compulsively practicing the latest 10 second dance craze.强迫练习最新的十秒舞曲
93And it feels like they're angst and asking,感觉他们很生气,问,
94is that all there is?就这些吗?
95And I just want to yell, yes, that is all there is.我只想大叫,是的,这就是一切。
96If all you're going to do is settle for dancing如果你只想着跳舞
97给别人的TikTok节拍。
98Settling is very insidious.设置非常阴险。
99It keeps us dancing on this string,它让我们在弦上跳舞
100waiting for this elusive better day to miraculously appear.等待这个难以捉摸的好日子 奇迹般的出现
101Now, thanks to Lali's tutelage, that's not my story.现在,多亏了Lali的照顾,那不是我的故事。
102In fact, I take each day as it comes其实,我每天都在想
103by trying to make it better than the last.试图让它比上一个更好。
104So, you know, I'm single, but I'm always ready to mingle.所以,你知道,我是单身的, 但我总是准备交配。
105I'm an entrepreneur, but I keep multiple revenue streams.我是一个企业家, 但我有多种收入来源。
106I'm a solo traveler, which means I've done the sepia version我是一个独行侠, 这意味着我已经做了Sepia版本
107of Eat, Pray, Love on six continents.六大洲的爱、祷告和爱
108Because I don't settle, what that means is that因为我不和解, 这意味着
109I also don't second guess my decisions.我也不想再猜我的决定了
110And I'm also not worried about my future我也不担心我的未来
111because I'm firmly rooted in the present.因为我扎根于现在
112Settling is a really sinister thing.设置是一件非常邪恶的事情。
113It will keep you up at night, tossing and turning,它会让你在晚上, 抛掷和转身,
114trying to figure out why.试图找出原因。
115And trying to answer that age-old question of,并试图回答这个古老的问题,
116is that all there is?就这些吗?
117Personally, I don't have time for that就我个人而言,我没有时间
118because the only time I want to be kept up因为我唯一想被保持的时间
119all night long, tossing and turning,整个晚上,抛掷和转身,
120is when I'm in the company of a fine ass man.当我和一个好男人在一起时
121That's it.就这样
122I wish I could tell you guys that I learned我希望我能告诉你们 我学到了
123all these valuable lessons from Lali来自拉利的所有这些宝贵教训
124and they were instilled in me and it was great.他们被注入我体内,这是伟大的。
125But alas, I am a late bloomer in all regards.但可惜,我是一个晚开花 在所有方面。
126So I had to learn a couple of lessons所以我得学几个教训
127from the era of bitchy bevy.从贱货时代开始的
128What kind of person has 10 assistants in five years?什么样的人五年内就有10个助手?
129Bitchy bevy, that's who.臭Bevy,这就是谁。
130Now, I didn't start out my career with a toxic attitude.现在,我没有开始我的职业生涯 一种有毒的态度。
131No, initially I was really happy不,一开始我真的很开心
132to be in the fashion industry.在时尚行业。
133But then I began to compare my trajectory to others但后来我开始比较我的轨迹
134and I also began to feel burned out我也开始觉得被烧焦了
135because I was burdened by these personas that I had created因为我被这些我创造的人 所负担
136that were allegedly gonna help me progress in my career.那据称会 帮助我进步 我的职业生涯。
137I made a couple of mistakes.我犯了几个错误。
138One, I thought that being snarky was a good career move.第一,我还以为 偷懒是个好职业
139It wasn't.事实并非如此。
140I also thought I looked good in the color brown.我也觉得穿棕色衣服很好看
141I actually don't.我其实没有。
142Yeah.对
143And you know, I just, in my dream montage,你知道,我只是,在我的梦中蒙太奇,
144I wanted to get away from bitchy bevy.我想离开那臭婊子
145I wanted to get away from the color brown.我想远离棕色。
146And so in the movie version of my life,因此,在我的电影版我的生活,
147as soon as I quit my job, I'm a yoga guru.我一辞掉工作就成为瑜伽大师
148I'm extremely limber and very happy.我非常无助 非常快乐
149Come to think of it though, guys,想想看,伙计们,
150I'm actually limber and happy right now,我其实是软弱和快乐的现在,
151but I would be lying and I believe但我会说谎 我相信
152it is against international law to lie during a TED Talk.在TED演讲中撒谎是违反国际法的。
153So I'm not gonna do that.所以我不会那么做的
154And as a matter of fact, my insecurities pop back up事实上,我的不安全感又回来了
155as late as last year.和去年一样晚
156I was minding my business, as one does,我关心我的工作,就像一个人一样,
157perusing social media and I saw people excelling浏览社交媒体,我看到人们杰出
158in a space where I, you know,在一个我,你知道,
159traditionally had a lot of success.传统上是成功的
160So I'm looking at it and I'm like,所以我看着它,我很喜欢,
161well, why the hell they didn't call me for that job?为什么他们不叫我做那份工作?
162And I have this like angst.而我有这样的愤怒。
163And then I realized they didn't call me for that job后来我意识到他们没给我打电话来做那个工作
164because you always said you didn't want that job.因为你总是说你不想那份工作
165You told the universe you weren't into working like that.你告诉宇宙 你不喜欢那样工作
166You don't want a job, I really don't.你不需要工作,我真的没有。
167I'm not into it.我不感兴趣。
168So that's why it happened.所以才发生了
169And what I realized is that intellectually,我意识到,在智力上,
170I had grown and evolved, but emotionally,我成长和进化,但情感上,
171I was Tom Petty and I was living in Petticoat Junction.我是汤姆·佩蒂,我住在佩蒂科特交叉口
172I told y'all that Brown doesn't look good on me.我跟你们说过布朗不适合我
173Petty looks even worse.佩蒂看起来更糟糕。
174It's not my shade.这不是我的影子。
175And so what I wound up having to do was really get a grip.所以,我最后必须做的是 得到真正的控制。
176I had to assess a few things about myself我不得不评估一些关于我自己的事
177and I decided to do a little self-help ritual called我决定做一个小小的 自助仪式,叫做
178take a note, give a note.记下来,记下来
179And it's easy.则易.
180When you see someone having something当你看到有人有东西
181that you believe you deserve, you take a note.你相信自己应得的, 你记下。
182You ask yourself a few questions.你问自己几个问题
183Is it something that you really want?这是你想要的吗?
184Perhaps that person is better suited than you are for that.也许那个人比你更适合
185Does the universe, is the universe conspiring宇宙是宇宙的阴谋吗?
186for you to have that?让你拥有它?
187Really kind of try and be honest with who you are真的有点尝试和诚实的你是谁
188and where you're at in life.以及你现在的生活
189Once you do that, you take a deep breath一旦你这样做,你就深呼吸
190and you say, their wins have nothing你说,他们的胜利一无所有
191to do with my worthiness.和我的能力有关
192And then you're ready to give a note.然则备注.
193You go on social media and you say, congratulations.你上社交媒体说,恭喜
194On my personal favorite, you pick up the phone我最喜欢的是你接电话
195like it's the 20th century and you say,就像是20世纪,你说,
196congratulations, kudos.恭喜你,库多斯
197You did that, Al, you go girl.你做到了,艾尔,你走女孩。
198You do all the things.你做所有的事情。 你做所有的事情。
199Instantly, you feel like a better human being立刻,你觉得自己是个更好的人
200because you have actually extended grace.因为你实际上扩大了恩典。
201You've extended grace.你赐予了恩典
202You've extended grace to someone else.你给别人恩典了
203And I believe that when you remove malice from your heart,我相信当你从心中消除恶意时
204not only do you feel better, you look better.你不仅感觉好点,你看起来更好。
205I think you lose your frown lines and your wrinkles lessen我想你失去了你的皱眉线 你的皱纹减轻
206and your age spots disappear.你的年纪就消失了
207I believe it's better than Botox, extending grace.我相信这比肉毒杆菌要好 宽宏大量
208I do, yeah.是的,没错。
209No, but let me get back to the note thing.不,但让我回到纸条的事情。
210So one of my favorite notes is from Willie Shakespeare我最喜欢的笔记是威利·莎士比亚写的
211{\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}去自已的真相
212Now we've all read self-help books现在我们都读了自助书
213and the first line of defense is always,第一条防线是永远的,
214be your most authentic self.成为你最真实的自我
215And I believe in that.我相信这一点。
216I believe that nobody can be you but you.我相信除了你之外,没有人能成为你
217So you might as well show up and show out.所以,你也许应该 出现和显示。
218But here's the quandary that the bar never put forth.但这里是酒吧从未提起的难题。
219What if you don't really know who you are如果你真的不知道自己是谁
220because you have suppressed your inner self?因为你压制了内心的自我?
221You've suppressed the core of you.你压抑了你的核心
222You've suppressed the best parts of you你压抑了你最好的部分
223because you took on these other identities因为你掌握了其他身份
224and these personas in an effort to make your life better.这些人是为了让你的生活更美好
225Because you know, we all buy into some things因为你知道,我们都买一些东西
226about what we're supposed to be doing关于我们应该做什么
227and who we're supposed to be.和谁是我们应该做的。
228So what if you squelch that?所以,如果你捏这个呢?
229Because I know I had to excavate因为我知道我必须挖掘
230to dig up little brown bevy.挖出小棕色贝维。
231But the way I found it was through three questions.但我发现它的方式 是经过三个问题。
232Who am I at my core?我是谁?
233How am I being perceived?我被怎样看待?
234How would I like to be perceived?怎样看待我?
235Who am I at my core?我是谁?
236At my core, I'm looking to authentically connect with people.以我为核心,我期待与人真正联系起来.
237I don't like a cursory, you know, interaction我不喜欢粗略的,你知道的,互动
238and I do not believe in networking.我不相信网络。
239I like an authentic connection.我喜欢真正的联系
240I'm also curious and I'm adventurous and I'm kind我也好奇,我很冒险,我很善良
241and I've got big dreams.我有一个伟大的梦想。
242How am I being perceived?我被怎样看待?
243你们都知道这个绰号,Bitchy Bevy
244So duh, but here's the problem.所以,问题就在这里。
245There's a lot of power in that persona这个人有很强的力量
246and I actually really enjoyed it for a time, you know,我真的很喜欢它一段时间,你知道,
247because you can make a lot of money being a bitch,因为你能赚很多钱当婊子
248especially in fashion.尤其是时尚界
249But it's also incredibly lonely and isolating但它也是令人难以置信的孤独和孤立
250and I didn't want to live that life anymore我不想再过那种生活了
251and so I decided to change my life.所以我决定改变我的生活。
252And I left all of that alone.我却把一切都丢下了
253I really did like just change my spirit我真的很喜欢改变我的精神
254and leaving fashion obviously helped.离开时尚显然有所帮助。
255And when I did that, all of a sudden I let当我这样做的时候,突然我让
256Little Brown Bevy out to play.小布朗岛 出来玩吧
257Little Brown Bevy, I love her so much.小布朗岛 贝薇,我太爱她了
258Little Brown Bevy is a nerdy girl小布朗岛 Bevy是个书呆子
259and so I let my nerdy pursuits come out to play.所以我让我的书呆子追求出来玩。
260I must have joined every museum or museum mile我一定加入了每个博物馆或博物馆里
261in New York City.在纽约市。
262I began to travel the world just to look at architecture我开始环游世界,看看建筑
263I'd always dreamed of.我一直梦想着
264I learned how to be alone without being lonely.我学会了孤独而孤独
265My spirit shifted.我的灵魂变了
266I became a better person.我成为一个更好的人。
267You can ask people, I became a better person.你可以问人们, 我成为一个更好的人。
268And now I get to stand here in front of you guys现在我站在你们面前
269with no bravado, with nothing to prove.没有什么好证明的
270I tell you, with nothing to prove.我告诉你,没有证据
271I'm not trying to prove nothing to y'all.我不是想向你们证明什么
272Thank you.谢谢
273I have an open heart and I can't even believe我心胸开朗,我简直不敢相信
274that Little Brown Bevy from 150th Street and 8th Avenue150街和8大道的小布朗贝维
275from the Hamlet of Harlem is now an award winning radio从哈莱姆的哈姆雷特 现在是一个获奖电台
276and TV host, an author, an actress, a creative consultant.和电视主持人,作家,女演员,创作顾问.
277I would do all those things for free.我愿意免费做所有这些事情。
278But here's the thing.但问题是
279I ain't cheap and I'm definitely not free我不便宜,我绝对不自由
280so don't get any ideas.所以不要有任何想法。
281But I am here in this mama I made it moment但我在这里的妈妈 我让它的时刻
282as someone who can show up as her most bevious self成为她最明显的自我
283because I've done the work.因为我已经做了工作。
284Yeah, my most bevious self.是啊,我最明显的自我。
285So, you know, I'm gonna show up.所以,你知道,我会出现。
286You guys, some of you have met me.你们有些人见过我
287You know I'm vibrant and boisterous AKA loud, okay?你知道我是充满活力和生气的AKA大声,好吗?
288You know that I'm gonna show up你知道我会出现
289and I've got a pep in my high heel, red bottom step.我高跟鞋跟上有个小便 红色的底部
290I do have heaving cleavage我确实有裂缝
291and I've got a tell it like it is approach to life我有种感觉,就像生命的走向
292that's always dosed with a ladle of love.总是用一连串的爱来消磨
293It took me 55 years to get here.我花了55年才到这儿
294So Chris Rock, you're right, I'm a late bloomer克里斯·洛克 你说的对 我是个晚开花的
295and that's okay because I'm right on time没关系,因为我准时到
296because it gets greater later.因为以后会变大
297Thank you.谢谢
该视频共有字幕 299 条。解锁更多字幕为会员功能,请移动到 价格