TED演讲：关于寻求帮助，孩子们能教会我们什么？
字幕摘录
| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 0:05 | What can we learn from children about being better humans? | 我们能从孩子们那里学到什么 成为更好的人类? |
| 0:08 | They're firstly loyal to their friends, fast to defend, quick to apologize, and swift to | 他们首先忠于朋友,迅速防卫,迅速道歉,迅速道歉. |
| 0:13 | forget. | 忘记吧 |
| 0:13 | But as a past kindergarten teacher, always a kindergarten teacher at heart, I want to | 但作为一个过去幼儿园的老师, 总是一个幼儿园的老师在内心,我想 |
| 0:18 | share with you a surprising lesson I learned from them about being asked for help. | 与你们分享我从他们那里学到的关于寻求帮助的惊人教训。 |
| 0:23 | I love human behaviors, how we act differently in different situations and environments. | 我喜欢人类的行为,我们如何在不同的情况和环境下采取不同的行动. |
| 0:28 | And these cute five-year-olds, with their adorable cheeks and the perfect height to | 这些可爱的五岁小孩 带着可爱的脸颊和完美的身高 |
| 0:31 | give warm morning hugs to, and almost a competitive love for high fives, were so interesting. | 给温暖的早晨拥抱, 和几乎竞技爱 高五,是如此有趣。 |
| 0:37 | My first class was called the Mars class. | 我的第一个班叫火星班 |
| 0:40 | I had 10 students, and each were so full of character. | 我有10个学生 每个都充满了性格 |
展开字幕全文（150 条）
| 序号 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | What can we learn from children about being better humans? | 我们能从孩子们那里学到什么 成为更好的人类? |
| 2 | They're firstly loyal to their friends, fast to defend, quick to apologize, and swift to | 他们首先忠于朋友,迅速防卫,迅速道歉,迅速道歉. |
| 3 | forget. | 忘记吧 |
| 4 | But as a past kindergarten teacher, always a kindergarten teacher at heart, I want to | 但作为一个过去幼儿园的老师, 总是一个幼儿园的老师在内心,我想 |
| 5 | share with you a surprising lesson I learned from them about being asked for help. | 与你们分享我从他们那里学到的关于寻求帮助的惊人教训。 |
| 6 | I love human behaviors, how we act differently in different situations and environments. | 我喜欢人类的行为,我们如何在不同的情况和环境下采取不同的行动. |
| 7 | And these cute five-year-olds, with their adorable cheeks and the perfect height to | 这些可爱的五岁小孩 带着可爱的脸颊和完美的身高 |
| 8 | give warm morning hugs to, and almost a competitive love for high fives, were so interesting. | 给温暖的早晨拥抱, 和几乎竞技爱 高五,是如此有趣。 |
| 9 | My first class was called the Mars class. | 我的第一个班叫火星班 |
| 10 | I had 10 students, and each were so full of character. | 我有10个学生 每个都充满了性格 |
| 11 | But there's this one kid I'll never forget. | 但有一个孩子 我永远不会忘记。 |
| 12 | Let's call him Sam. | 让我们叫他山姆。 |
| 13 | Sam behaved like he forgot he was only five. | 山姆的行为就像他忘了他只有5岁。 |
| 14 | He was so independent. | 他是如此独立。 |
| 15 | Not only did he know how to tie his own shoelaces, but he knew how to tie other kids' shoelaces | 他不仅会系鞋带 而且会系其他孩子的鞋带 |
| 16 | too. | 也一样。 |
| 17 | He also never took home a dirty thermos because he would clean it after his lunch. | 他也从来没有带回家 脏热液,因为他会清理 后他的午餐。 |
| 18 | And if something happened and he needed a change of clothes, he would do so very quietly | 如果出了什么事,他需要换衣服, 他会非常安静地这样做 |
| 19 | and discreetly by himself. | 和谨慎地自己。 |
| 20 | He didn't ask for help much himself, but he was the one that his classmates went to | 他没有要求太多帮助 但他是同学去的 |
| 21 | for help. | 寻求帮助。 |
| 22 | Help on things like, can you help them finish their kimchi because it's too spicy? | 帮帮忙,你能帮他们 完成他们的泡菜,因为它太辣了? |
| 23 | He didn't like showing any type of affection to teachers and came across as the cold kid. | 他不喜欢对老师表现出任何类型的爱 并且作为冷酷的孩子遇到。 |
| 24 | If you gave him a good morning hug, he would roll his eyes and make a funny face as to | 如果你给他一个早上的拥抱, 他会滚他的眼睛 并做一个有趣的脸 关于 |
| 25 | show discontent, but also stand there and wait if he didn't get his morning hug. | 表现出不满,但也站在那里,等待 如果他没有得到他的早晨拥抱。 |
| 26 | He was so smart and reliable that even I would forget that he's only five. | 他那么聪明可靠,连我都忘了他才五岁 |
| 27 | As a novice teacher, I spent a lot of time observing how more experienced teachers interacted | 作为一名新教师,我花了很多时间观察 经验丰富的教师是如何互动的 |
| 28 | with their students. | 他们的学生。 |
| 29 | And I noticed something very peculiar. | 我注意到一些非常奇怪的事情 |
| 30 | Oftentimes when kids fall, they don't start crying immediately. | 经常当孩子跌倒时,他们不会立刻开始哭泣. |
| 31 | They would stand up, puzzled, as if trying to make up their mind, you know, what just | 他们会站起来,迷惑, 仿佛试图决定,你知道,什么只是 |
| 32 | happened? | 发生了什么事? |
| 33 | Is this big of a deal enough for me to cry? | 这事够让我哭吗? |
| 34 | Does this hurt? | 疼吗? |
| 35 | What's going on? | 这是怎么回事? |
| 36 | Usually kids will be okay until they lock eyes with an adult, one that they trust and | 通常,孩子会好起来,直到 他们锁定的眼睛与成年人, 他们信任的, |
| 37 | know can do something for them. | 知道可以为他们做点什么 |
| 38 | Eyes lock, then they burst out in tears. | 眼睛锁上,然后泪流满面 |
| 39 | When I noticed this, I so wanted it to happen to me. | 当我注意到这一点,我所以希望它发生在我身上。 |
| 40 | Because to me, that meant that you had earned a kid's trust and had proven that you're | 因为对我来说 这意味着你赢得了一个孩子的信任 并且证明了你 |
| 41 | capable to help them with anything. | 能帮他们什么忙 |
| 42 | You are a hero to them. | 你是他们的英雄 |
| 43 | Weeks went by of me just watching other teachers have kids run to them in tears and I'm watched | 几周来我只看到其他老师的孩子 哭着跑到他们身边 我被监视着 |
| 44 | in jealousy. | 吃醋的时候 |
| 45 | Oh, was I jealous? | 哦,我嫉妒吗? |
| 46 | I mean, of course I didn't want the kids to fall, but I really wanted that moment of | 我的意思是,我当然不希望 孩子们跌倒, 但我真的很希望那一刻 |
| 47 | validation that yes, I had earned a kid's trust enough to be the one to help them. | 我赢得了一个孩子的信任 足以帮助他们 |
| 48 | Then it finally happened. | 后来终于发生了. |
| 49 | It was a beautiful day. | 这是一个美丽的一天。 |
| 50 | It was during recess at the indoor playground. | 在室内操场休息期间。 |
| 51 | The kids were playing and I was getting some things laminated because teachers are forever | 孩子们在玩,我得到了一些东西 包裹,因为老师永远 |
| 52 | laminating stuff in the teacher's room next door. | 在隔壁的老师房里装东西 |
| 53 | Then I heard a kid yell, teacher, teacher, Sam fell down. | 后来听到一个孩子大叫,老师,老师,山姆倒下了. |
| 54 | So I went out to peek, looked around for Sam and there he was, looking very puzzled as | 于是我出去偷看 四处寻找Sam 然后他在那里 看上去很困惑 |
| 55 | if he was trying to add double digits. | 如果他想加两位数的话 |
| 56 | Then he looked at me, our eyes locked, and then it happened. | 然后他看着我,我们的眼睛锁住了,然后就发生了。 |
| 57 | His lower lip started to tremble and his tiny eyes started to fill with tears. | 他的下唇开始颤抖,他微小的眼睛开始充满泪水. |
| 58 | Then he burst out in tears running towards me and it was glorious. | 然后他泪流满面 奔向我身边,这是辉煌的。 |
| 59 | I'll never forget that moment. | 我永远不会忘记那一刻。 |
| 60 | He let me give him a big hug and to help him calm down and turns out that yes, he did trip | 他让我给他一个大拥抱 为了帮助他冷静下来 结果发现他确实出事了 |
| 61 | over his own two feet so there was no one other than the floor to reprimand. | 在他自己的两只脚上,所以除了地板之外,没有其他人可以训斥。 |
| 62 | We checked to make sure that he wasn't hurt and he overcame that with not even a bruise. | 我们检查过以确保他没有受伤 他没有擦伤就克服了 |
| 63 | It was in that moment, oddly, it didn't feel like I was there to help Sam, but rather he | 就在那一刻 奇怪的是 感觉我并不是为了帮助Sam 而是他 |
| 64 | was giving me this gift, this opportunity to help him. | 送给我这个礼物, 这个帮助他的机会。 |
| 65 | And it's something very weird that I struggle putting down in words. | 它是一个非常怪异的东西,我挣扎 放下在言语。 |
| 66 | With his vulnerability and coming to me for help as if I could do something about it, | 带着他的脆弱性 来找我帮忙 好像我能做些什么 |
| 67 | you would think that gives me the power. | 你会认为这给了我力量。 |
| 68 | But in that moment, no, it was quite the opposite and the power shifted even more so to him. | 但是,在那一刻,不,这是相当相反的,权力转移到他身上。 |
| 69 | Being asked for help is a privilege, a gift for you to do something for someone, especially | 被请求帮助是一种特权 是一种礼物 让你为某人做一些事情 尤其是 |
| 70 | when it's coming from their place of vulnerability. | 当它来自他们脆弱的地方。 |
| 71 | With everything I learned from kindergarten or in teaching kindergarten, I want to conquer | 我从幼儿园或者教幼儿园学到的一切 我想征服 |
| 72 | other things in life. | 生活中的其他东西。 |
| 73 | Fast forward nine years and I landed in an association for project management professionals | 快速前进九年,我降落在一个协会 项目管理专业人员 |
| 74 | in a role that works extensively with volunteers. | 发挥与志愿者广泛合作的作用。 |
| 75 | Working with volunteers is a wonderful experience, but there are some things I wish I had been | 和志愿者一起工作是一个很好的经验, 但是有些事情我希望我曾经 |
| 76 | warned about, like how to set boundaries. | 警告,比如如何设定界限。 |
| 77 | It's very easy to fall into the rabbit hole of because they're volunteers. | 很容易掉进兔子洞里 因为他们是志愿者 |
| 78 | Late night calls? | 深夜电话? |
| 79 | Yes, because they're volunteers and have day jobs. | 是的,因为他们是志愿者,有白天工作。 |
| 80 | Business trips that are almost exclusively only on weekends? | 几乎只在周末出差? |
| 81 | Yes, because they're volunteers and have day jobs. | 是的,因为他们是志愿者,有白天工作。 |
| 82 | Not to pat myself on the back, but I got quite good at my job. | 我不是来拍屁股的 但我很擅长我的工作 |
| 83 | I was thriving off of the relationships I was building. | 我从我建立的关系中兴旺起来 |
| 84 | And the best way I knew how to judge whether I had earned someone's trust was if they | 我知道如何判断我是否赢得了别人的信任 |
| 85 | would come and ask me for help. | 会来找我帮忙的 |
| 86 | I loved it. | 我喜欢它。 |
| 87 | Every time we did year-end retreats and talked about what we wanted to be in the next year, | 每次我们进行年终退缩 谈论我们想要在下一年, |
| 88 | my keywords were always help or helpful. | 我的关键词总是帮助或帮助。 |
| 89 | The problem was that I wasn't being just helpful. | 问题是我不是在帮助你 |
| 90 | Over time, I put more and more pressure on myself to always be busy and to always do | 随着时间的推移,我给自己施加了越来越多的压力,让自己总是忙着做 |
| 91 | a good job. | 不错的工作。 |
| 92 | Soon, my self-worth became associated with my performance at work, which is basically | 很快,我的自我价值 与我的工作表现有关, 这基本上是 |
| 93 | a recipe for disaster. | 灾难的秘方 |
| 94 | But don't worry, because I had the best coping mechanism, which was denial, distraction with | 但别担心 因为我有最好的应对机制 就是否认 分散注意力 |
| 95 | even more work, and drinking. | 还要工作,还要喝酒 |
| 96 | And lots of it. | 还有很多 |
| 97 | I was so busy being helpful and independent and being a great Sam that I forgot how to | 我忙于帮助 独立 做一个伟大的山姆 我忘了如何 |
| 98 | ask for help when I needed it. | 需要帮助的时候就请求帮助 |
| 99 | All I had to do was ask, and if I truly believed that asking for help was a gift, then I should | 我要做的就是问 如果我真的相信求救是份礼物 那我应该 |
| 100 | have been doing it more, right? | 已经做了更多的,对不对? |
| 101 | Well we don't always practice what we preach, but about two years ago, I was slapped with | 嗯,我们并不总是 练习我们所宣扬的, 但大约两年前,我被扇耳光 |
| 102 | a big fat reminder. | 一个巨大的提醒。 |
| 103 | To say that I was burned out at that time was an understatement. | 说我在那个时候被烧成灰烬是轻描淡写 |
| 104 | But thanks to my coping mechanism, drinking, it looked like I was just having a great time. | 但多亏了我的应对机制 喝酒 看上去我玩得很开心 |
| 105 | But one day, just like Sam in the playground, I tripped over my own two feet. | 但有一天,就像山姆在操场, 我绊倒了自己的两只脚。 |
| 106 | I blacked out and woke up with a big cut on my foot from broken pieces of glass, eyes | 我晕倒了,醒来时脚上被玻璃碎裂的伤口,眼睛 |
| 107 | swollen from crying, and a voice so hoarse that I most likely had been wailing. | 哭得肿胀 声音那么粗糙 我很可能一直在哭 |
| 108 | I don't have much recollection of what actually happened, but I remember feeling frustrated, | 我对实际发生的事没有多少记忆, 但我记得感到沮丧, |
| 109 | sad and afraid. | 悲伤和恐惧。 |
| 110 | Now you've known me for only about 10 minutes, but you could probably tell that this was | 现在你认识我只有10分钟了 但你可能知道这是 |
| 111 | really not like me. | 真的不喜欢我。 |
| 112 | So when I came to my senses about what had happened, I was in shock. | 因此,当我对所发生的事情有了理智时,我感到惊愕。 |
| 113 | There was no other way of saying it other than that I needed help, both in the sense | 除了我需要帮助之外,没有别的办法了,从这个意义上说 |
| 114 | of I needed some type of therapy help, but also help in getting out of that situation. | 需要某种治疗帮助, 但也帮助摆脱这种局面。 |
| 115 | It was one of the lowest moments in my life, and even in that moment, my mind was running | 那是我生命中最糟糕的时刻之一 即使在那一刻 我的思想也在奔腾 |
| 116 | in hyperspeed into problem-solving mode. | 在超速状态下进入解决问题模式。 |
| 117 | What do I do with this? | 我该怎么办? |
| 118 | If I don't fix this, then I'm even more of a disappointment. | 如果我不解决这个问题,那么我更是失望。 |
| 119 | If I don't resolve this, then I'm even more of a failure. | 如果我不解决这个问题,那我更是一个失败者。 |
| 120 | Those are things that were running through my mind, and it didn't even occur to me that | 那些东西在我脑海中流淌 我甚至没有想到 |
| 121 | I could ask for help. | 我可以请求帮助。 |
| 122 | I was surrounded by so many people who cared for me and wanted to help, but I just couldn't | 我被这么多人包围着 他们关心我 想要帮助, 但我只是不能 |
| 123 | see them. | 看他们。 |
| 124 | Until, finally, my good friend had to literally hold me by my shoulders and force me to ask | 直到最后,我的好朋友 不得不用我的肩膀 强迫我问 |
| 125 | for help. | 寻求帮助。 |
| 126 | Can you do this? | 你能做到吗? |
| 127 | No. | 没有 |
| 128 | Do you need help? | 你需要帮助吗? |
| 129 | Yes. | 对 |
| 130 | Can I help you? | 有什么事吗? |
| 131 | Yes. | 对 |
| 132 | Can I get others that love and care for you to help you too? | 爱和关心你的人也能帮你吗? |
| 133 | Yes. | 对 |
| 134 | That was my grown-up version of locking eyes with my teacher, and just like that, as soon | 那是我长大的版本 和老师一起锁眼睛 就像那样,尽快 |
| 135 | as I said, yes, you may help me, I felt a tingling of hope and some sort of control | 就像我说的,是的,你可以帮我, 我感觉希望和某种控制 |
| 136 | coming back. | 回来 |
| 137 | And if you think about it, isn't it so weird? | 如果你考虑一下 是不是很奇怪? |
| 138 | We spent all of childhood being so good at asking for help and are expected to grow up | 我们度过了整个童年 如此善于求救 并期望长大 |
| 139 | {\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}成为这些自立的人 {\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}我们很擅长 {\fn黑体\fs22\bord1\shad0\3aHBE\4aH00\fscx67\fscy66\2cHFFFFFF\3cH808080}我们必须被提醒 | |
| 140 | that it's okay to ask for help. | 请求帮助也没关系 |
| 141 | Later that moment helped me realize so many things. | 后来,那一刻帮助我意识到了这么多事情。 |
| 142 | I'm always so happy to help others and I love it. | 我总是很乐于帮助别人 我爱它 |
| 143 | Why wouldn't others be willing to help me? | 为什么其他人不愿意帮我? |
| 144 | And more importantly, why wouldn't I want others to feel the happiness and joy that | 更重要的是,为什么我不希望别人 感受到幸福和快乐 |
| 145 | comes from helping the SAMs of the world? | 从帮助世界的SAMs? |
| 146 | We all want to be the best SAMs in life, to be strong, independent, and self-reliant. | 我们都希望成为生命中最好的SAM,成为强壮,独立,自力更生的. |
| 147 | But we don't always have to be. | 但我们并不总是必须如此。 |
| 148 | So let's start asking for help more often, because helping SAMs is a privilege and a | 所以,让我们开始更频繁地寻求帮助, 因为帮助SAMs是一种特权和一个 |
| 149 | gift. | 礼物 |
| 150 | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
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